#231 – What's the source of your indecision?"If you have more than one reason to do something (choose a doctor or veterinarian, hire a gardener or an employee, marry a person, go on a trip), just don’t do it. It does not mean that one reason is bette...
#230 – Has "feeling good" become a tyranny?A few years ago, I met a woman in an online community whose husband had died unexpectedly. She wrote that, when learning the news, she'd dropped to her knees, in disbelief and unfathomable pain.Then, she sai...
#229 – Is self-victimization keeping you stuck in guilt?The Ghost of Misplaced Guilt (GoMG) had been gnawing at my ear every Monday since I started my weekend job selling coffee machines at a mall, with a commute of at least 90 minutes each way. "You...
#228 – What does openness give you that hope doesn't?The act of hoping is, in itself, a judgment.Hoping implies categorizing some life events as intrinsically, objectively "desirable," and others as "undesirable."But is that true? Desirable according...
#227 – What's wrong with clinging to hope?Since I mentioned Pema Chödrön's "anti-hope" teachings ("When we give up hope, that is the beginning of the beginning," in When Things Fall Apart), a few weeks back, I've been seeing more and more how hope is...
#226 – How are you resisting life by "trusting?"I used to believe that the ultimate act of surrender was total trust –– like riding the roller coaster hands off. But that's not accurate. Like hope, trust has a hidden agenda: a specific outcome that y...
#225 – How might you be defending yourself?This morning, the A Course In Miracles* lesson I read was, "If I defend myself, I am attacked."When a few hours later I was doing dishes, the idea came to me that I defend myself way more than I'm aware of....
#224 – If change is natural, why do we resist it?Life is, by definition, ongoing change. Call it evolution, if you'd like.Every day that passes, every minute, things are happening in our body and the world that make us and the world different from be...
#223 – Did your date meet your expectations?Even if you didn't go on a date last night, you've had that experience: you're so looking forward to an event and you have such high expectations, that the reality leaves you "meh."Behind all disappointment...
#222 – What's the true purpose of presents?As a kid, my parents' questions about what I wanted for my birthday or Christmas made me mad – "They should know what I want," I thought.Years later, when I realized I wasn't able to read my son's mind (surp...