I'm sending this earlier than usual because I don't want you to miss a sale that ends today! See the "Bonus" below.Voice recognition mistake of the day: I wanted to find out what kind of uniform somebody might wear if they were hired to power wash a...

Southernism of the Week: “She’s got some snap in her garters.” Depending on whom you ask, this either means she's capable or she has sex appeal. Either way it sounds better than saggy garters.Visit the Amazon series page for Felony Melanie: Sweet Hom...

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Mistake of the day: Voice recognition is supposed to make choices based on context, so how did it think “Is this when she males the letter?” made sense? And how would one even male or female a letter?  Big News: Something Shady at Sunshine Haven...

Southernism of the Week: “I could sit still for that” meaning something is acceptable. Also: “It’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.” Hm. Most things are.Visit the Amazon series page for Felony Melanie: Sweet Home Alabama romantic com...

Voice recognition mistake of the day: “We can pull some geez ...”  In airplane pilot terms, pulling Gs means doing a maneuver that uses acceleration to increase gravity ... Okay, it's complicated. Look it up if you’re interested. Anyway, this ca...

Southernism of the Week: “She’s finer than frog hair split eight ways!” Frogs don't have hair, so split it eight ways and it becomes extremely fine indeed. (She’s so fine she’s nonexistent? 🤔) Tell your friends: Felony Melanie and the Prank War...

Voice recognition mistake of the day: My mom asked by e-mail if I wanted an apple crumb or a fresh peach pie for my birthday.I intended to respond "peach," but voice recognition came up with "each" – which I must admit is a better response. 🥧It's b...

Southernism of the Week: “She’s hot as a two-dollar pistol.” A cheap pistol gets hot quickly when firing due to thinner steel in the barrel. Apparently, the idiom can refer to how angry someone is or how attractive they are, or it can even refer to t...

Voice recognition mistake of the day: “It’s not real money out right now, but rubber boots will keep off the dirt and all.” Er, muddy, not money!I wish there was real money out! It would make it worthwhile to brave the intense heat—100 degrees and up...