#52 – The writer and the mindSitting at the desk my mother bought for me at the thrift shop, I noticed how my mind moved faster than my pen.As a result, my writing was shallow and had holes in it. Angry, I dropped the pen.I rested my gaze on the...

#51 – And what about feelings?You know that passive-aggressive person in your life, who pouts and sulks whenever they can't have it their way, so that you'll feel bad and let them have it their way?That's a little how the Ghost of Idea Deflection wor...

#50 – What makes the Ghost of Idea Deflection go to work?When we don't question our thoughts, we keep thinking them without being aware. We think them every day, multiple times a day, but we don't know we're doing it. Over time, repeated thoughts tur...

#49 – Your thoughts are real, but are they true?A reader asked, "How do you erase them, though?" She was responding to my prompt, "What message do you need erasing?" (at the end of a post about what my father said).The message I erased was that I cou...

#48 – What do you stand to lose if you don't stand up for yourself?Leo Lukenas, 25, died on May 2after working more than 100 hours a week for months as an Investment Banking Associate at Bank of America.He couldn’t say no to his boss—he feared losing...

#47 – How generous are you... in receiving?Most people love giving. It makes us feel generous, expansive, thoughtful. The warmth in our heart when our niece opens her gift and we see her face light up.The sense of pride when we provide a colleague wi...

#46 – Your toughest opponent in your sales negotiations?It's you.And it has to stop, if you ever want to stop underearning for good.Here are a few questions to help you determine whether you negotiate against yourself when trying to close a deal.Do y...

#45 – The real reason setting boundaries feels hardIt's not you – it's them.If you've been "educated" (like I have) to feel responsible for other people's feelings, setting boundaries feels like a horrible thing to do.Whenever you try to set boundari...

#44 – Are you trying to help or is this contempt?The line between contempt and helpfulness can be blurry.A few months ago, a business deal I was working on with another coach and her business partner fell through.I offered to conduct a 'retrospective...

#43–Why do we "hate" selling, really?Selling is leading (in a way). When we choose ourselves to lead, it’s like declaring to the whole world that we believe in our ability to take on a higher level of responsibility. As we do that, the Ghost of Need...