Instagram LogoCounting Down To Christmas [Trigger warning] As colleagues bid each other happy holidays, it’s not ‘happy’ for everyone. Whilst various sources are inconsistent with whether or not there is an increase suicide rates during the holidays, one thing I know for sure is that those who use work as their crutch, will inevitably feel the sting of loneliness - if not despair. Rewind back more than a decade ago. I was a fresh graduate, with altruistic dreams. I was working for a relative, to be groomed as the successor to that empire; working twice if not three times as hard, because I wanted - NEEDED to prove my worth. To cut to the chase, it didn’t work out. My health failed and I found myself on edge. Literally, on the edge of my top floor apartment window. After a few failed suicide attempts, I wouldn’t feel anything. It was simply numbness. I prayed that I would feel something - anything. Until a strong gust of wind knocked me back from the window, then FINALLY, I felt a little something. The little something was Hope. There was a way out, even if I didn’t know what, how or when. When people attempt suicide, it’s because they want so desperately for the life that they know to end. I needed this monotony to stop. Just because somebody might ‘have it all’, come from a ‘good family’, or just be the type of person you never need to ‘worry about’ because they’re always smiling - they may only be a shell of a person left. Never assume. This is a time where I feel such sorrow for my younger self, but I know I am not alone. Through God, who is outside of time and space, I give my younger self strength and love. I forcibly make her attempts to end her life hard AND I make her work life so difficult so she learns it’s NOT for her. (Continued in comments)