The Note: Y.4 N.20: How do I say "thank you" now that she's gone?

Dec 19, 2022 1:14 am

18 Dec 2022 sent from MGM, AL. The Note ... email to share MY reflective practice with YOU... click reply, let me know how you are!


Y.4 N.20: How do I say "thank you" now that she's gone?


Dear ,

 

Last Sunday rocked me... first, I home-tested (twice, different tests) positive for COVID.


Immediately, I went upstairs to isolate, and Jodi made plans to fly to CA. Now, we needed her there a week early, before her visit to the parents, in case she got it as well.

 

Then, I got a phone call that I knew was coming but didn't want nonetheless.

 

I met Frances at a book launch for my mentor Marshall Goldsmith. I'll always remember feeling out of place at the Four Seasons New York City that night, awkwardly looking around when I saw her sitting at a table across the room. I don't know what my face said, but at that moment, Marshall looked at me (there must have been 100 people there) and said,


"Yes, that is Frances Hesselbein. You can go meet her."

 

I'd heard about Ms. Hesselbein. I mean, ANYone who studies leadership should know of her.


She was the CEO of the Girl Scouts of the USA from 1976-1990. She was a leadership department chair at West Point, teaching alongside Jim Collins. Her mentor was Lloyd Austin (yes, THAT Austin), and Alan Mullaly would call her regularly for advice.


That night she was sitting at a table about 10 yards away that night.

 

I walked over to her and introduced myself. I pointed to my name tag and said, "Hi, I'm Jason Womack and..."


...she looked right to (or was it through) me, and asked,

"Mr. Womack, thank you for coming to support my friend Marshall. How can I serve you?"

 

That was the moment I knew I'd have a mentor for life. And to be honest, that's also when I worried that time was of the essence. I mean, she was born in 1915 and this was 2007. Who knew how much longer I'd have?

 

As I built our business, wrote and published books, and traveled up to 250 nights a year over the next 12 years, whenever I was in New York City, I made a point to plan a couple of hours to visit with Frances in her office. (THAT'S a story worth learning...)

 

We wrote articles together. We produced newsletters. We even rocked a couple of Facebook Live "global webinars." (Hit reply and I'll send you a link to a 9-part (just about 1-hour) conversation that Frances, Jodi, and I had about diversity, equity, leadership, and belonging.) I called her my teacher, my mentor, my friend.


Last Sunday at 12:34PM Central, I got the call that Frances had passed away.


I won't list all the things she did. You can read her obituary or you can simply do an Internet search for "Frances Hesselbein." If you do, plan to stay there for a while. Me?


I'd give anything for one more knee-to-knee with my Battle Buddy.


image

 

Over the years (this won't surprise any of you), I wrote her quite a few cards. In fact, Jodi and I sent her a Holiday card right before Thanksgiving. I like to think that she got it, read it, and smiled, thinking of how much we love her.

 

If I could write one more note, it would be this one: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/jasonwomack_frances-hesselbein-1915-2022-activity-7010407379380953088-PXqM


I will leave you with one of the stories she wrote in her book, "My Life in Leadership."


The background was she had a new Girl Scouts pin designed by Saul Bass. When it was unveiled, there were a group of people determined to vote it down, paying homage to the original pin design from pre-World War I. After it was presented she said,


"From now on, this will be our service Mark, our Girl Scout pin, our logo we will be using on all of our materials, but I promise you, as long as there is one person among our 3 1/2 million members who wants to wear the traditional pin, we will continue to manufacture it. You have my word."


With respect and appreciation, she moved forward.


That's my mentor. One step - at a time - toward a future we can't see yet.


If you'd like to read what the University of Pittsburgh wrote: https://www.pitt.edu/pittwire/features-articles/frances-hesselbein-obituary

If you read the NY Times: https://www.nytimes.com/2022/12/15/us/frances-hesselbein-dead.html

If you


Sending you love from Montgomery,


JW



PS: Last week, I published this piece about #connection in the workplace: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/expectation-management-connecting-work-life-dr-jason-womack  If you read it and like it...re-post it, ok?



















How did The Note* from MGM (Montgomery, AL) begin?


Jodi and I moved to Alabama in 2019. After being here for just less than a week, I opened up my email to send a note to my family in friends in California and beyond. Jodi was on her way to join me here, so I took some time to reflect on this significant life decision/change I had initiated. That Tuesday, January 22nd, 2019, I sent an email at 9:38 pm (or, as I was beginning to learn: 2138). Here's how it started:


Today was my first day as an employee of the United States Air Force. And, I am bold enough to say I've never been prouder or more excited to serve a community.


Though I "moved" to Alabama last Wednesday [Jodi plans to be here Monday], I went to my New Employee Orientation just today. The 90-minute briefing culminated in me taking the Oath:


"I, Jason Womack, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well; and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God."


All at the same time, I felt pride, Honor, and a hefty dose of responsibility. I'm helping leaders on a grand scale.




*The following Sunday, and Sundays from time to time I've sent a note to my family and friends. Thanks for reading, and gratitude (more!) for clicking reply and letting me know what YOU'RE reflecting on!

 

Comments
avatar Chris Roness
They say it is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. That is one heck of a person to have loved and learned from, and though I’m sad for you and for your loss, I’m also grateful that you got to know such a person. I hope to hear about some of those powerful lessons one day, so that her memory and her leadership can live on…through you. May God bless you in your next world, Francis…he sure knows you left one heck of a positive mark on this one.