Apologies to John Maxwell but failing forward is dangerous
Nov 04, 2022 12:55 pm
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Hey there!
Fail Forward!
Fail and Fail Fast!
I still remember the first time I came across those words!
Very inspirational.
And for a long while...
It was my battle cry...
It’s not completely false....
But as much as it pains me to admit...
Mainly because I've shared that as "wisdom" at various points in my life....
It’s an incomplete truth.
And falls in the category of what I call well meaning bad advice.
Back when I was much younger...
My mother use to go on and on about me being sure not to touch the electric iron when it was hot...
But I wouldn't listen...
Then one day she let me touch it...
Let's just say I didn't touch it ever again...
A lot of us tend to learn most from action and immediate consequences...
We tend to thing we only learn fully from experience...
Personal Experience...
Unfortunately this "I must touch the iron" method of learning has an insidious side effect.
Learning through experience helps us understand the short term complexities of the problem at hand.
Basically....
We figure things out...
Measure the consequences...
And then decide if the thing we just figured out is a viable solution to our problem(s).
Seems pragmatic enough.
The problem is this:
Often times there are consequences to our actions that are experienced
somewhere else in space and time.
This is called “dynamic complexity.”
Maybe the deal we made put unnecessary stress on our accounting
department.
Maybe a vacation we took made our spouse or family question our motives.
Maybe the crash diet destroyed our thyroid or planted the seeds of disordered eating in the minds of our 8-year-old daughter.
I'm talking the things that are not immediately obvious to us..
But are still consequences of our actions.
Herein lies the danger:
Eventually those consequences come back full circle and kick us in the you know what.
And sometimes the delay is often so great...
And the chain of events so dynamic that...
We never track it back to the initial behavior that caused it....
The consequences of our actions are often disguised as somebody else's
mistake.
Naturally...
We blame that person...
We never adjust our own interpretations of the original action-consequence...
And as a result....
We didn’t actually learn from our experience.
I once had a client who blamed society for her daughter's body image issues...
Later we found out...
The foundation of that....
Was all the crash dieting she did 10 years earlier.
Tomorrow I share a story with you that digs into this concept at a deeper level...
Till then...
Get out of your own way.
CTM