Today is a special Mother’s Day for me.
I love my Mom, and am forever grateful to her for all that she’s given me: for the gift of this life, this mind and body; for the special memories of reading stories at bedtime; and for so much more.
I'm also getting a new perspective on where it all started.
My wife is 21 weeks pregnant and we are expecting our first child in mid-September. Each day, as her belly grows, I bear witness to the incredible transformation happening in her body as well as the courage it takes to step into the emotional intensity and uncertainty of parenthood. It's staggering to take in the reality that she is literally growing another human being inside of her.
We are such complex creatures that it takes the greater part of a year to make a human being. Every one of us alive on this planet spent at least a solid six months being nourished inside a womb. And of course, that’s just the beginning…
I’d be remiss to write about Mother’s Day without acknowledging the absurdity of celebrating Moms for just one day a year given how critical mothering is to society’s well-being, and how vast the gap in equity is for the unpaid physical and emotional labor of pregnancy, child-rearing and home-making.
By “mothering” I mean that set of human instincts for care-giving, empathy, and fierce protection that transcends gender roles, and is represented by Mothers.
The journey of love, acceptance and forgiveness between a mother and child is difficult terrain. Over my years of teaching communication, I've had so many heart-breaking conversations with mothers or adult children who are estranged or struggling with fraught relationships.
We do our best with the resources we have to raise our children, and inevitably make mistakes along the way. As a parent-to-be, I can only begin to fathom the heaviness of wanting nothing more than to offer your child all of the love and blessings possible in this world, and to be faced daily with the reality of one’s limitations—emotionally, psychologically, financially or otherwise.
Wherever you find yourself, and whatever your relationship is with your own mother (or your children if you have them), I invite you to step back and appreciate this immense capacity we have as human beings to love and care for one another. How bleak the world would be without it!
Consider doing something to honor the Mothers in our world, all of those doing the hard work of raising children, loving, teaching and caring for them.
Warm wishes,
Oren
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