My kids were young when Disney's animated Beauty and the Beast hit the theaters. My favorite song from the movie is the "Something There."

This song explores Belle's realization that there's more to the Beast than she's seen —or allowed herself to see.

The song begins:

There's something sweet

And almost kind

But he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined

And now he's dear, and so unsure

I wonder why I didn't see it there before

I believe this song is perfect for spouses who look at their mate and only see "beastly" things: unkindness, laziness, poor communication, gruffness, strictness, bossiness, no sex, betrayal, etc.

I'm here to tell you that there are spouses out there who want their marriage to work, and just haven't been good (yet) at making it happen. But, it's in their heart in spite of the past and their failed attempts.

I encourage you to take a fresh look at your mate to see if you can 1) see something that wasn't there before, 2) acknowledge it, and 3) cultivate it to make your marriage work.

Hint: it has likely been there, but you've been unable to see it because it doesn't match the picture in your mind that you have of your mate based on the past.

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