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Three days ago I wrote to husbands about what your wife needs from you (your shoulder), and what she doesn't need (your mouth).

Today I'm writing to wives.

Wives, build your husband up, not compare him to other men.

In the heat of the moment it can be easy for you to compare your husband to another man, including his father (ouch!).

While seemingly harmless and instructive, it's actually destructive.

Just as much as women want to feel secure, men want to feel competent.

Comparing your husband to a another man who's doing something yours isn't (or is doing it better) will not inspire inspire your husband.

It will demean him, and cause him to feel inferior.

He may not tell you this, but it's going to tick him of.

Oddly, I were to say it to him, it may get his competitive juices flowing because it's coming from another man.

I can't explain it fully, but I need you to take my word for it.

If you want to build your husband up, actually build him up by encouraging what HE is able to do.

Stay away from "building him up" by comparing him to what another man is doing.

Kevin