Marriage lessons from the house move

Oct 22, 2020 12:58 am

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Last Thursday my family began moving to a new house.


It was a grand total of 1.3 miles, but it involved more effort, attention, finances, and energy than I thought I'd have to expend.


Sounds like marriage.


Over the next few days I'll share some revelations I gained about marriage from moving.


This email is about the first revelation: preparing for the move.


Preparing for a move is two-parts stressful, and one-part exciting.


While there's the anticipation of going to a new place, but there's also the dread of everything that must be done to ensure the move is successful: 


  • discarding excess/unused/old items
  • packing items that will move with you
  • stopping utilities at the old place
  • starting the at the new place
  • rerouting mail
  • choosing a moving day
  • soliciting help from family and friends
  • booking a moving company or rental truck to make the move happen, and of course
  • finding a new place to live


(Listing these items is making me tired all over, again!)


There's a LOT that goes into making sure a move is successful.


Miss any of these steps, and you're going to have some bumps in the road either when you're moving or after you've moved.


Similarly, there's a lot that goes into getting married.


It's not enough to just go to the Justice of the Peace, a local church, arboretum, a chapel in Vegas, or wherever you're getting married.


You've got to put some forethought into it. You've got to anticipate the challenges associated with marriage, then come up with a plan to address the challenges.


While you cannot perfectly anticipate everything that will happen in marriage, you're going to be a lot more successful in the venture if you at least think through the obvious things, such as:


  • communication styles
  • resolving conflict
  • spiritual issues
  • friends and family
  • handling finances
  • sexual expectations
  • blended family situations
  • leisure activities, etc.


In fact, the more time you spend thinking about these issues and developing a plan prior to marriage, the more confident you'll feel when they arise (and they'll definitely arise).


Just like moving, there's a lot that can be done before the wedding day.


And, just like moving, the longer you wait to get started on marriage prep, the tougher things will be for you when the big day arrives.


If you've been married for a while and this email doesn't pertain to you, I encourage you to send it to friends or family who are preparing (or not preparing) for marriage.


Thanks for reading, and I'll be back with you tomorrow.


Kevin

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