I heard a preacher say, "Marriage is designed to kill you before it blesses you."

If that's so, the question becomes, can you die enough to get blessed?

Marriage is meant to shape you, not just make you happy. It reveals parts of yourself you'd rather not see, bringing up areas that need growth and healing. Dying to yourself in marriage means letting go of pride, selfishness, and control. It’s choosing to love, even when it's inconvenient or painful. Only when you surrender these things can you experience the deeper blessings of connection, trust, and intimacy.

The blessings come, but only after you’ve let marriage do its refining work.