The tension of the double-standard
Sep 28, 2020 1:35 am
Read Time: 46 secs
There's nothing more frustrating in marriage (or any relationship) than to be called out by someone for doing something that they have done / continue to do themselves.
For example, take Susan and Mark.
Susan is quick to get on Mark for his highway driving. According to her, he weaves in and out traffic, gets too close to the cars in front of him, and brakes hard. Mark might be more open to what she's saying IF she didn't do the same thing when she's in a rush to get places.
Whenever Mark brings this up when she's "driving like him," Susan justifies her actions because she's in a hurry, and/or doesn't do it as often as Mark does.
Bringing up our mate's double-standard makes us feel good, but, it rarely changes behavior.
If anything, it makes our spouse dig in and justify the very behavior we get accused of.
So, what can you do about it?
If you've noticed that conversations like this go nowhere each time you bring it up, drop it. Let it go. Stop talking about it.
Sometimes we have to live with the tension of the double-standard.
After all, we're likely holding our mate to a standard we don't keep ourselves.
Kevin