The Danger of Familiarity: Lessons from the Attic

Nov 03, 2023 7:01 am

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Attic Flooring | The Attic Stairs & Flooring Ltd



Last night I installed an electric hoist in the attic above my garage. For a couple of hours I was stepping near and around a nearly 2 ft by 4.5 ft rectangular opening almost 20 feet above my concrete garage floor.


At some point after working a while, I heard myself say out loud: "When you become familiar, you stop paying attention." Although I wasn't thinking about it consciously, it seems that my brain was automatically reminding me that I could misstep, fall, and get seriously injured due to familiarity.


It turns out that that statement also applies to our marriage relationships. When we become familiar with our spouse, we stop paying attention to him/her and ...


  • how we're treating her
  • what he needs
  • what matters to her now
  • what he's saying
  • what she's feeling
  • how he's changing
  • and more


Of course, when we stop paying attention in our marriage, all sorts of things - including divorce - are laid on the table as viable options.


The first step in avoiding those options?


Pay attention.


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