Hey ,

I know you are hurting. 

Healing from trauma in any form is tricky - rape, incest, fondling, sexual abuse. All of these are traumatizing events. It doesn’t matter how your family, society, church or the entertainment industry tries to normalize it…. when someone takes over your body, you are traumatized. 

Healing involves coming to terms with pain. It means grappling with changing emotions, difficult emotions. It means feeling raw and dirty and mutilated. 

But here’s the thing, if you are feeling and acknowledge the feelings of anger, hate disgust fear…… 

Know that you are worthy

Know that letting those feeling out

…expressing

 …..is healthy

You may not believe me, but just be being here; Just because you are reading this,  I know that you are strong.

It is hard. There will be good days. There will be bad days.

You will make it through. 

, you will make it through.

Holding you safe

I am

Dr. Sandra Hamilton

2.   Healing from trauma means being patient with yourself.

Be proud of the steps that you have taken. It could be one or two. It could be a micro step. It could be one step forward and two steps backward. That’s ok. The fact is that you are making an effort, even if its only mentally at this time, you are making an effort to heal. 

3.   Have you been to therapy or counseling and yet find yourself struggling to implement the coping strategies suggested? 

Stop stressing!

The fact that you sought help is in itself a humongous move. Give yourself time to adjust. Give your body a chance to catch up with your emotions. Recognize that you are still afraid. 

Be gentle with yourself. 

4.   Why should you seek counseling or therapy to deal with your issues? 

Going for counseling does not mean that you have to re-live the event. In fact, you don’t necessarily have to even speak about it if you don’t want to. 

Counseling/therapy seeks to help you cope with your current life. 

If you want to develop or strengthen your coping skills, if you want support. If you know how you would like to behave but are having trouble doing so… then seek therapy. 

May I ask you to do something for yourself?

Write down the top three traits that you would like to see in yourself.

How are you going to develop that courage, that fearlessness that confidence? How will you find that peace that your restless soul is longing for? 

This is what therapy does for you….

It allows you to figure out how/ what you expect from the world, what you want from the world and what you are willing to put in to get what you need.

Examine the picture of the future of you that you created with those three traits. Add somebody to that now. Begin to visualize yourself beautiful, strong, empowered, smiling and in control.

Know that that picture is you. 

Yes! It is possible.

You become the person that you think you are. Why not book a call and let’s see if I can help you make that picture a reality. https://sandrahamilton.coach/book-in-a-call/

5.   When you have experienced trauma - guilt, self-doubt and ‘what-if’ may become frequent unwanted visitors. 

Why don’t you hop onto a call with us, and let us help you to banish those haunting memories or at least help you face the fear, hold your hand and walk with you as you mentally shift gears into a more positive place.

https://sandrahamilton.coach/book-in-a-call/

6. Do you need therapy? Some survivors of sexual abuse seek help right away. Others seek counseling years after the incidence of sexual violence. Still so many others, way too many – never get help.

The fact is, seeking help for something as personal as sexual abuse is downright scary. I admire those brave enough to confront their fears and get immediate help. But so often, even when we are referred for and seek help, we don’t get what we need. We feel helpless. In fact, sometimes we don’t even know how to express how we feel. We are ashamed angry, outraged. 

We are scared that it was really our fault. How do we explain that we didn’t do anything? Who will believe us?

So we hold it down, push it into the recess of our minds. The thing is – its still there. The fear and feelings of shame have not been evicted from the body so we develop various forms of sickness which often seem unrelated to the incident, and we develop coping mechanisms that will protect us from being ‘seen’.

This is necessary – but not healthy for us in the long term

When is the right time to seek help?

When you are ready. 

You will seek help when the pain becomes unbearable because your body, when it can no longer cope, is tired of hiding – it will find a way to speak. But why wait until then?

If you have suffered from a traumatic event get the help when you feel strong, get the help when you feel weak, get the help while you are coping.

Get help from someone who will take the time to listen deeply with you. 

I am Sandra Hamilton. I tried to reach out for help several times after I was raped. I tried religion, being a recluse, the party life. I went to doctors and psychiatrists. it took me 30+ years to find someone who allowed me to speak my truth the way I experienced it. 

A weight rolled of… I was able to connect the dots between being raped and being afraid to speak, afraid to achieve, afraid to succeed, being an introvert. I made the links between my health, obesity, dislike of all things girly and being raped. 

I came away from that encounter powerful, aware that my life had meaning, a hell of a lot more confident. I am no longer afraid to take up space in a room. No longer afraid to speak up for myself because interestingly – I always spoke up for others – the poor, the oppressed – I never spoke up for myself. 

The fact is, once we have been abused, it is as if we wear a sign that tells the whole world that we are a ready target. …and many victims get abused multiple times by different people. And even when we appear strong in the public sphere, we feel weak and afraid in our private lives. 

My wish for you is to become empowered. I wish for you to feel SAFE and free; to be comfortable in your own skin. 

My own personal experiences have made me so much more empathetic than any formal training could (even though I do have that). Today, I am offering to help you overcome your own personal challenges and demons. Today I am offering you a chance to be Free!

Book some time to speak with me here…….https://sandrahamilton.coach/book-in-a-call/

And I promise, that if I cannot help you, I will refer you on to someone else who can.

Please, take this step for your own health and well being today. 

Book in a call here. …https://sandrahamilton.coach/book-in-a-call/

Holding you safe

Dr. H