Ok ,

So we’ve looked at how you show up through the colors you wear and the types of clothing you prefer. We’ve looked at where you’ve drawn your boundary lines and why. Today, let us examine the touchy subject of forgiveness.

When you have been abused - anger, shame, suicidal thoughts and murderous thought often come to fore. Many religious/spiritual counselors tell us to forgive the perpetuators. I say &^%$#

The key really, is to forgive yourself.

Stop wondering what would have happened if you hadn’t wore that dress, shirt, tights, pants…

Stop telling yourself that it would not have happened if you’d gone straight home, not gone to the party, not had that drink

Stop saying to yourself, “If I had listened to..”

Stop saying I am a bad girl. I must be a bad person for this to have happened to me. And STOP listening to the people who say that to you.

No. Your teasing, your dancing, your dress, your piety and your brilliance did not cause him/her to rape and abuse you. That was their own doing.

You are perfect exactly as you are.

You were perfect then.

Yes you are.

Take a breather and let that sink into the core of your being. Feel it as it moves into your bones. Breathe in knowing that you are worthy of love. Knowing that you have every right to be brilliant. Breathe in knowing that your beauty is a gift to be treasured.

Breathe out and let go of all the frustration and sorrow that you have stored in your body for so long. He had no right to punch you. He had no right to say those things about you. He had no right to get into your head and mess with you.

You’ve been holding your breath so tightly for so long. Breathe out. Make it long, slow and deep. Breathe out knowing that you are fine. Knowing that you can find aligned support to help you get through this

Breathe out knowing that you are normal.

The anger and confusion and pain are normal

Breath out knowing that you are doing the best you can. So forgive yourself . Hug yourself. LOVE yourself.

You are simply amazing.

Holding you safe,

Reminding you that you are awesome.

Dr. Sandra Hamilton

The Confidence Builder