Hello ,

This week I found myself caught in a loop that followed me from morning coffee to midnight worry. A 9-month coaching program—the kind that makes your soul lean forward and whisper "yes, this"—had landed in my world.

Deep diving into self-care practices. Connection to nature. Online community. Everything my depleted spirit was craving.

My heart said YES immediately.

And then… reality walked into the room.

The same week: My autistic teenager in crisis. My husband's severe back pain. Me, reaching for the emergency after-hours support line at 2am, barely breathing through another meltdown.

And through it all, this decision looping: Yes, I need this. No, it's too much. Yes, but what if I miss out? No, but seriously, WHEN would I even do this?

The loop became its own exhaustion. And the worst part? I was doing this to myself—adding pressure to a life already compressed by caregiving.

Here's what changed everything:

I decided to just DECIDE and feel how it landed in my body.

When I imagined saying yes: My chest tightened. Breath went shallow.

When I imagined saying no: I exhaled. For the first time in days.

That exhale told me everything.

Three things I learned that might help you this week:

1. Your body knows before your mind does

Next time you're spinning in a decision, pause. Imagine each option fully. Notice: Do you constrict or expand? Does your breath shallow or deepen? Your body is wiser than your overthinking brain.

2. "Not right now" is a complete sentence

You don't need to justify why you can't add more to your already-full life. You don't need to apologize for having limits. Sometimes the most radical self-care isn't adding another program—it's having the courage to say "I'm already doing enough."

3. The loop is the real exhaustion

The actual decision matters less than the energy you're spending spinning. Give yourself a deadline: "I will decide by Tuesday at noon." Then decide. Even an imperfect decision creates more peace than perfect indecision.

A simple practice for your week:

The 5-Minute Body Check

When you're caught in any yes/no loop:

• Get quiet (bathroom counts)
• Put your hand on your chest
• Imagine saying YES - notice what happens in your body
• Imagine saying NO - notice what shifts
• Trust what your body tells you
• Honor it without justification
• 
  

I've been using this all week. Sometimes I whisper my truth into my voice recorder app because hearing my own voice say it out loud cuts through the mental noise.

Here's what I want you to remember:

If you're adding self-imposed pressure to an already overwhelming life…

If you're judging yourself for not being able to "do it all"…

If you're afraid that saying no means missing out forever…

Please know: The life you're living right now—with all its chaos and caregiving and crisis calls—is already the advanced practice. You don't need to add anything to be worthy.

This week's reflection question:

Where are you creating pressure that doesn't need to exist? What would it feel like to release it?

In this week's Soulful Sunday edition, I'm sharing the full story of my week—including the 2am crisis call, the whispered voice recordings, and why declining that program felt like the deepest self-care I've done all year.

I also share:

• A poem about the loop that keeps us spinning
• The body-wisdom practice that helped me finally decide
• Journal prompts to help you honor your own capacity
• A guided meditation for releasing self-imposed pressure
• The "Release Ceremony" ritual for letting go with grace

[Read this week's free edition: "The Relief of Disappointing My Dreams"]

If Sunday stories like this speak to your soul—if you're craving permission to be human, to have limits, to choose less instead of more—I'd love to have you join our Soulful Sunday community.

Each week you'll receive:

• Real stories from the messy middle of life (no toxic positivity here)
• Practices that take 5 minutes because that's all we have
• Permission to rest without earning it first
• Gentle rituals for overwhelming weeks
• A reminder that you're already doing enough
• 
  

[Join The Soulful Sunday Subscription for $11/month] - delivered straight to your inbox (no app needed).

Before you go, remember this: Every shiny opportunity will still exist when you're actually ready for it. But right now? Right now you're allowed to exhale and choose what you can actually hold.

With so much love and every relieved exhale,

Charity 💜

P.S. - That coaching program I said no to? My body hasn't regretted it once. But my mind? It's still occasionally arguing. That's okay. I just put my hand on my chest, take a breath, and remember: my capacity right now is not a limitation—it's information. And I'm finally learning to listen.

P.P.S. - If you're in your own yes/no loop right now, try this: Set a timer for 5 minutes. Voice record or write every messy thought. Then ask your body what it needs. The answer might surprise you. Or it might just make you exhale. Both are perfect. 🌸