Carolina Perez Sanz, PhD by Carolina Perez Sanz

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Hiding from the bankers

How childhood memories about money turn into money ghosts

#1 –– Misplaced shame

My dad came back from the bank one Saturday afternoon (it was 1977 in Madrid, so, no online or phone banking, not even ATMs). My mom asked what had taken him so long, wanting to blame him for the cold spaghetti.


Smiling, he told us his little adventure. As he was stepping into the bank, he spotted the branch director. Fortunately, he said, the director didn't spot him. Thinking fast on his feet, he opened the newspaper and hid his face behind it. Why? Because if the director saw my dad, he'd ask the tellers to not give him any money because we were "in the red."


Now I'm guessing this was a joke, my dad's way to embellish a Saturday morning errand. But back then, I believed it was true.


At seven, I created the beliefs that:

  1. being "in the red" is something to be ashamed of
  2. bank directors are there to shame us when we are "in the red"
  3. it's ok to continue to spend money even when you don't have it
  4. it's ok to continue to do whatever you've been doing to get to this situation, so long as you don't get caught


What beliefs about money have you been carrying around since you were seven?


Love,

Carolina

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