#42–Why do we "hate" selling?

"I don't want to be pushy," my friend A.K. responded when I said she'd make a terrific sales consultant.

Why do most people hate selling? What do they think selling is really about?

In my job demonstrating coffee machines, I've come to understand, at a cellular level, what some people say: that selling is a service.

If someone who loves coffee comes inquiring about coffee machines because they want a coffee experience at home that matches their love for coffee, what can I tell you? I "sell" them the machines I'm demonstrating because I truly believe they brew the best coffee one can have consistently at home.

I'm not 'selling' any more than I'd be 'selling' to my son the idea of opening an investment account and an IRA as soon as he gets his first paycheck.

So, why would anyone "hate" offering their help to another person? Why would someone feel they're being "pushy?"

Because the Ghost of Misplaced Shame tells us that when someone doesn't want what we're offering, they're in fact rejecting us.

Feeling rejected makes us feel worthless because, our brain tells us, people only reject what they find has no value.

And when another human finds that we have no value, we feel ashamed – what's wrong with us?

That's why we hate the idea of being "pushy." It's like trying very hard to be accepted, only to be told a resounding "no!"

But, as I told A.K. that afternoon, sitting at the bar at the Waterfront Brewery in Key West, terrific sales consultants aren't pushy.

They celebrate both the "nos" and the "yeses" and respect the client's decision – knowing that it's not about them.

Thus, nothing to be ashamed about.

How do you feel about "selling" in broad terms (re: offering, proposing, stepping up to lead...)?

Love,

Carolina