#419 – Why is your Ego so paranoid?

"Rationality is what helps you survive."

Nassim N. Taleb, Skin in the Game

Since your Ego is the internal program running in your brain 24/7 that helps you stay alive, your Ego is rationality.

Great, you can thank your Ego, then, and keep listening to it because it's doing its job.

Or is it? Taleb also writes, "Rationality is avoidance of systemic ruin" (meaning: extinction. Nada más! Kaput!).

Now, if you ask your Ego to define "ruin," you'll see how it misses the point.

That day when I froze in front of a room full of 30-something analysts at the Swiss bank in Midtown Manhattan, my Ego called "ruin!" Yet here I am––I survived the racing heart, the red ears, and the dry mouth.

Had I listened to my Ego then, I'd have quit that super high-risk job on the spot!

Your Ego may tell you that asking for a raise puts you at risk of ruin. Or saying 'no' to someone you love. Or forgiving someone you don't love. Or speaking in a foreign language in front of your boss. Or posting a half-baked piece on Substack. Or gaining weight, a weird haircut, ill-fitting jeans, expensive coffee, a sleepless night.

But none of those "risks" are ruin-triggering: you'll survive them all.

Not even having a son in jail is ruin. Or spending half your savings in his defense and seeing him plead guilty in a courtroom when his attacker walks, posing as the victim.

How will you put your Ego's "ruin" calls in perspective, so that you can take the risks that are worth taking?

Love,

Carolina