#128 – Peace begins inside: from self-investigation, to awareness, and presence

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Some things are unpleasant, that's a fact. But until we master the art of being able to be with them, we'll do whatever it takes to avoid them – i.e., not to be present with them.

The desire to avoid that which we can't be with keeps us on high alert, constantly on the lookout for anything that might trigger us. That hyper-vigilance is the opposite of peace.

So, how can we reach a state of sustained peace?

By cultivating our capacity to be present with all aspects of life, even the unpleasant ones. The capacity to:

• be with any emotion that arises, in ourselves and others
• witness anything without being triggered
• feel safe in any (non-physically threatening) situation, no matter how others look or speak to us.

And how do we build the habit of being present?

We begin by noticing our automatic reactions – paying attention to what we avoid. The key is to become aware of ourselves and our attitudes towards the different aspects of life.

What happens inside of me when I see a rainbow after a storm? Or when I hear a baby cry? When I smell movie-theater popcorn?

To build this awareness, we self-investigate – we get curious. We ask ourselves questions that take us deeper and deeper in our knowledge of ourselves.

One way to practice this self-investigation is through the RAIN meditation, which guides us, step by step, to go deeper within ourselves:

• Recognize: what am I feeling?
• Allow: can I be with it?
• Investigate: what is really going on inside? What part of me wants to resist that feeling, memory, idea, experience?
• Nurture: what does this part of me (often a younger self) need from my inner leader, the part of me that can handle anything?

What's something that you're not now and you're curious about? (For example, I'm not patient and I'm curious about how I could change if I were patient)

Love,

Carolina

More resources to increase awareness:

• Dr. Dan Siegel's wheel of awareness
• Arny Mindell's Primary/Secondary/Edge model, in the book, Working On Yourself Alone
• Tara Brach's podcast, RAIN meditations, and book, Radical Acceptance