#470 – What pushes you to justify your rest?

Putting in 100-hour workweeks seems to be the new normal for some in Silicon Valley (this Wall Street Journal article says). A badge of honor, a feat deserving applause and admiration.

In such a culture, taking a day off is like stepping down your pedestal voluntarily––and who, in their right mind, would do that?

That culture is ruled by a despotic king: the Ghost of Exertion-to-Exhaustion (GoEtE). For the GoEtE, only two energy levels exist: 100%, and zero. If you're at 100%, you go, go, go. If you're at zero, you're a loser and we'll dump you.

Today I didn't go to the gym, and while writing my morning pages, I found myself justifying why.

At first I thought the Ghost of Need to Prove was moving my hand. The endless justifications often come from it: I'm not lazy, it's just that I didn't sleep well, or that I hurt my leg doing a sumo squat. Or an all-time favorite: I'm going to start working early so that I can put in more hours.

Ah! That's when I saw it: it wasn't the GoNtP. My search for a good-enough reason for skipping the gym was my attempt to get a permission slip from the Ghost of Exertion-to-Exhaustion.

If it gave me a pass, I wouldn't be dumped into the losers' bin. I could still call myself a valuable member of society.

Only by putting in my share of daily exertion, would I be saved. I'd work, work, work until my energy crashed. Then, I'd be so ashamed (Ghost of Misplaced Shame) and isolated (Ghost of Isolation), that I'd hide in a corner, licking my wounds.

After some time of mopey wound-licking, the Ghost of Misplaced Guilt would kick my feet, what are you doing? That would wake me up from my hibernation and, my energy back at 100%, I'd start it all over again.

That's how the Ghost of Exertion-to-Exhaustion keeps you under-being (and underearning). When you have energy (or money), you spend it irrationally, without recharging it with meaningful activities and rest. Then, when your energy's spent, you retreat from the world, with your tank (or savings account) empty.

How will you live more freely when you treat your energy like currency?

Love,

Carolina1