#418 – Where did you leave your compassion?

I thought I could save my son, help him reintegrate into normal life, motivate him to be productive.

But what I was doing was disregarding his need for and right to happiness.

This morning, I had to do some mental yoga to avoid screaming at him––once again––because he'd grabbed an Uber instead of using public transportation.

Once he was home and I saw his smile as he stirred the crema in his Nespresso cold brew-style coffee, a wave of happiness washed over me.

This is it, I realized. Reintegration isn't about doing things on a schedule, chop-chop (that's the Ghost of Exertion speaking). It's about enjoying freedom first, and relearning to live as a free man later.

He's happy just to be free, yet my Ego-driven optimization agenda kept pressuring him to move, do, change!

Hearing him laugh with something he was watching, I felt a cozy warmth in my cheeks and throat. I relaxed. This isn't tragic or sad. This is a moment of celebration, because he's free after surviving 10 months in unthinkable conditions.

If I want him to thrive, I need to understand and allow his joy. Allowing him to be happy isn't spoiling him. It's compassion.

What control will you release to make room for compassion?

Love,

Carolina