#544 – How can you retain your power when your Ego wants fear?

Fear (without an imminent physical danger) serves no purpose: it won't make you smarter or safer. It'll just sour your experience and shrink your life.

But fear is a learned habit difficult to get out of.

I learned fear from my father, who every night looked for monsters under the bed. Then I got into the habit of feeling fear anytime I didn't know what would happen next. And then, whenever I wanted answers I didn't have or faced a decision.

When I recently realized (duh!) that fear wasn't helping me, I decided to stop feeling it. But how, if it was my default mode?

Focusing on the fear, analyzing it to deconstruct it, it only grew stronger.

Ha! I'd misunderstood the teaching to invite Mara (fear) for tea.

Once you notice it, yes, you let it in and offer it a metaphorical cup of tea. But then you hand it a magazine and immediately go live your life in the other room. You sure don't entertain it!

That's what my husband's been doing for the past couple years. Every day, in the morning and afternoon, he goes on the websites of the Portuguese beaches near where our house will be and spends minutes looking at the ocean livestream. Then, he opens Google Earth and roams the streets in our future village and surrounding areas.

I thought he was just passing (more like wasting) time. But now I see he's been training his mind. Instead of, like me, allowing his mind to be filled with fear (will this dream come to fruition? Will we have enough money? Will the house be nice?), he was reinforcing the habit of being happy.

And there's no fear in happiness.

What happy place will you focus on to reclaim your power from fear?

Love,

Carolina