#450 – But how do you actually de-trigger your Ego?

If there's one thing your Ego and mine love, it's to be triggered. That means it gets at the helm and fulfill its dream of being in charge.

But while being triggered may feel empowering and energizing, it drains your True Self of resources, by narrowing your mental bandwidth.

To help your mature True Self to get back in charge, here's a fool-proof, step-by-step tool you can use whenever you notice your Ego's scampering and fist-swinging.

STEP ONE: Notice

You've noticed an internal shift towards tension: clenched jaw, tightened chest, hot face.

STEP TWO: Acknowledge

You say (to yourself or out loud), "Hm, here's this thing [feeling, thought, sensation]."

STEP THREE: See

Focusing on the sensation (not the reason why it's there or what it is, just the sensation), you visualize its physical features: color, size, shape.

It may be human (maybe a younger version of yourself, a teacher), animal (a blowfish, a Labrador), or thing (a rubber ball, a cloud of noise, a rock).

STEP FOUR: Place

Once you have a clear sense of what it is, you picture it inside you. Then, you physically gesture as though you're removing it from inside and putting it in front of you. You want to look it in the eye when you speak with it.

STEP FIVE: Talk

First off, thank it for coming to you and trying to help you. Then, ask it some questions:

• what does it want for you?
• what is it afraid of?
• what makes it think you need its help?
• what does it want from you?
• what does it love doing?

Always, as it responds to you, thank it and acknowledge you understand its underlying purpose.

STEP SIX: Ally

Once it answers your questions, you can let it know that you're an adult now and can take care of yourself. Also, you can take care of it.

So first, you'll tell it how you're going to signal that you've got this. For example, a hand gesture, or a phrase, a body movement.

Then, you'll give it permission to go and do whatever it loves doing (for example, my "triggered self" wants to be inside a book, learning: I send her there) whenever it gets your signal.

STEP SEVEN: Lead

You've got this! You don't need your Ego's help because your True Self can take care of you. But you also don't need to get mad at your Ego because it's just trying to help.

Your task is to convince it that you've got this. Because you do!

What’s your signal to let your Ego know you’ve got this?

Love,

Carolina