#135 – Who else lives in your "comfort" zone?

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That zone where your mind constantly returns? Habitual, yet rarely comfortable.

What Arny Mindell called Primary – what we do, feel, say, think, or become when we're not paying attention – shapes our so-called "comfort" zone of habitual behaviors.

Have you ever set a big goal and then spiraled into fear when the notice of your mortgage payment showed up? Or did you take a bold action one day just to wake up the next day full of shame for what you've done and what people will think of you?

That's because when you were trying to stretch, the pull of habit was so strong that, like an elastic band recoiling, it took you back to your Primary, your habitual pattern of behavior.

In Arny Mindell's words, as you approached the Edge – the gap between your habitual patterns and what might be on the other side, or Secondary – is scary. Or so your Ego makes you think.

Because the Ego is the true Chief of Staff of what you call your "comfort" zone. And whenever it sees that you're about to break free, it sends its cronies, the Money Ghosts, to keep you "safe."

• Dream of turning your life around with a business? The Ghost of Idea Deflection appears before you can draft a plan.
• Yearning to write a novel? The Ghost of Time Indifference keeps you 'too busy' to write.
• Want to exhibit art in Paris? The Ghost of Misplaced Shame makes you feel exposed in Times Square.

As soon as you spot the Ghost, address it, calmly but with assertiveness. Appreciate it for trying to help you and let it know that you've got this. Tell it, over and over again, "I'm ok; I've got this."

And then take the first step into your possibility.

How will your life change when you bypass the Ghosts, instead of following their recommendations?

Love,

Carolina