#429 – What's your Ghost of Time Indifference protecting you from?

The first tool of Underearners Anonymous is Time Tracking––and I resisted it.

Today, in my morning pages (which I'd been skipping until today because my Ghost of Time Indifference whined, "there's not enough time!"), I asked myself what about time tracking felt so threatening.

The obvious response was, "I don't know how to do it."

"That's ok," I replied, "not knowing is the way."

I kept asking, what else is there?

When I track my time, I may realize I have more than I think. And then, what will I do with all that time?

I'll have to write––isn't that what I've always wanted?

Then fear. What if my writing doesn't live up to my expectations? What if I'm not able to write the book as I have it in my head?

Aha! If I don't have time to write, then I'll never realize what a lousy writer I am––my Ego said. In cahoots with it, my GoTI insisted on my working more hours to make more money; walking to the grocery store to put in my steps; skipping meditation and morning pages because, work, work, work.

But if I'm awake for 16 hours every day and I want to work for six of those, I have 10 more hours––more than enough time to write and keep my mind and body healthy. The Ghost just doesn't want me to see it.

Knowing where my time goes doesn't take the fear away. But at least now I know the fear is just my Ego speaking and I can choose not to listen.

What will you do when you see you have time to do everything you want?

Love,

Carolina