#397 – How do you expand when you go from forgiveness to gratitude?

If thanking your "enemies" sounds radical, it's because it is. It's the ultimate shift in perspective: it allows you to go from victim, to lucky recipient of gifts.

Granted: some experiences aren't a walk in the park. They make you suffer, they break your heart and sometimes your body. You wish you didn't have them.

But that's exactly how you get stronger. It's antifragility: when you break down entirely, you rebuild yourself up stronger and more resilient. Like your hamstrings: they grow stronger each time they repair themselves after you've torn them with heavier and heavier loads in your squats.

That's why forgiving the culprit of your sucky experience (the mean boss who had you fired, your ex-spouse, who treated you like crap, yourself, when you spent money you didn't have, dazzled by a fantasy) falls short.

Forgiving these "enemies" reinforces the idea that there's something wrong about what they (or you) did.

But when you're certain that everything in life is a gift (even when sometimes you wish you could get a return label and send it back), then it's not forgiveness what you feel: it's gratitude.

What mistake/enemy/difficult experience are you willing to thank so that you reclaim your antifragility?

Love,

Carolina