In this world of narcissism, falling in love is more like a thing of the past. Everyone wants to stand tall. It seems that falling in love is for the faint-hearted, but the truth is exactly the opposite. I have come to understand also that many people are not as afraid of falling in love as they are about not being able to get up after falling.
There are a lot of folks who want to be sure about what the future holds before they attempt to fall in love. They keep asking - what if I fall in love and lose? Will it never lead to marriage? What if I give all I have, yet gain nothing in return?
People who have lost in love can tell how hard it is to fall in love again. Getting out of a relationship where they are mistreated by their partners or not loved in return is hard, but it is easier when compared to overcoming the fear of falling in love that usually accompanies such an experience.
A lot of folks never overcome the fear of falling in love and this may explain why their love lives are in shambles. To gain from love, you must be prepared to love over and over again even if you will keep losing. Too many people have a different opinion – they even adopt other people’s losses in love as an alibi to protect their fear of falling in love.
When most people fall in love & lose, the only lesson they learn is to become self-centered. Becoming self-centered, which is displayed in the act of avoiding falling in love, is the wrong lesson to learn from a failed love affair, but it is the only one that the majority of people learn.
This situation is easily explained - being self-centered is the default nature of human beings, and a failed love affair or story of it is enough for those who never move an inch from their default nature to become extremely self-centered. In another simple statement, it means that avoiding falling in love is evidence of a lack of self-development.
Many people do not fall in love except there is something for them to gain and they must first be sure of getting it. If you do not have what they want, even if they feel love for you, they will show you the opposite. In most cases, their minds have been configured not to fall in love and they do not.
To get in a relationship with such people, you have to show them, love, as if your life depends on them for them to believe you love them. They also rarely care about your feelings. They just want to gain from you and if you are not offering that, they can never fall in love with you. Those who avoid falling in love are narcissists, and narcissists are incapable of falling in love with other people.
A lot of folks have a lot of reasons why they do not fall in love. Many of them use their past experiences as alibis. They act the victim of love and that they will remain for their entire life no matter how smart they try to live except they give love another trial, & another & another until they win. They must also learn to love for love's sake & be less selfish.
They must throw themselves to love despite they may lose; they must be true to their feelings and express them. No one suppresses love and lives above mediocrity. Love, especially for someone or people who have lesser to offer you than you can offer them are usually God's direction to an event that may lead to your elevation to the next level of your life. If you become too self-centered and refuse to fall in love, you will always lose!
I am Soul'e Rhymez, a Philosopher & Author.
You can talk to me concerning your relationship issues.
To preorder my new book on NARCISSISM titled THE ENEMY OF THE LAST DAYS,
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