Howdy,

Over the past three weeks, I put a pause on writing for my new book (and this newsletter).

In the past this would've thrust me into a state of anxiety and depression. I would've feared that every day I chose not to write was only going to make it harder for me to write the next time I sat down.

I hear this narrative in many different areas of life. This idea that you "can't miss a day". Fitness junkies claim that your mind is "a bitch that needs to be conquered". Health nuts tell you that if you eat that one donut it will only make it harder for you not to eat another one.

All I see when I hear this a lack of trust in oneself. I know because I used to be the same way.

I chose to cancel plans with friends or not make them at all out of fear of what would happen if I stayed out late and didn't get up early in the morning to write the next day.

I wrote on days when all I wanted was to go outside and spend time in nature.

I became a slave to the very thing I told myself was serving me.

Now that I've began trusting myself more, that doesn't mean I give myself more excuses to not do these things. It means I pay more attention to why I'm doing something and whether or not doing it will serve me or create a problem in my life.

A great example is when we start a new job. The learning curve there means we may need to take a week or two off of some other activities so that we can truly focus on the job. But we might worry that if we take those two weeks off, we won't ever go back to our habit. So we tell ourselves we MUST do all of it. And now we have a problem:

We have to make time where there is none. And generally that means sacrificing peace of mind just to get shit done.

Let us not create room for guilt and mental punishment, but instead, a space for compassion when our mind and body needs to rest. Let us trust that creating this space will make us stronger, not weaker. Let us live in peace, not under pressure.

All the best,

Nick

(3/17) Writing Prompt: What activities have you become a slave to that used to serve you? Where is the pressure you feel to "never miss a day" coming from? I would love to read some of your responses to this!