Howdy friend,

This week I'm sharing with you 6 books that helped me learn about myself and get my shit together. It's been a gradual process. I didn't just read these 6 books in one month and then fix my life the next. Don't expect that to be the case for you either.

If you read even ONE of these 6 books, you'll be way ahead of the curve. Most people don't put any thought into the concepts explained in any of these books.

They are not difficult books, textbook-y books, or bullshit artists cashing in on the insecurities of hurting men and women.

They are books that anyone can read.

And they just might change your life.

1: No More Mr. Nice Guy! by Robert A. Glover

"Toxic shame is not just a belief that one does bad things, it is a deeply held core belief that one is bad."

Key takeaways:

• Being selfish means not taking care of ourselves, because that breeds resentment in the long run.
• Nice Guy Syndrome (NGS) exists when we do things for others only because we expect something in return.
• Avoid NGS by clearly stating your needs.
• NGS is a behavior learned in childhood and most commonly displayed in romantic relationships.

2: The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch

“No job is beneath you. You ought to be thrilled you got a job in the mailroom And when you get there, here's what you do: Be really great at sorting mail. ”

Key takeaways:

• Worry about usability more than appearance (i.e. does your car get you from point A to point B?)
• No job is beneath you. Accepting this means you never have to fear failure. (i.e. McDonald's will always be an option)
• Writing a book is just expressing an idea/teaching. You can do it without writing a single word yourself.
• Victimhood only exists to hold people back.

3: One Last Talk by Philip McKernan

"You’ve got to remember, by sharing your pain and your truth, you are not only helping yourself, you are helping everyone who hears it as well."

Key takeaways:

• We decide how to share our truth. No one else.
• Sharing is the last step of processing when it comes to emotional pain.
• There are others out there who need to hear what we have to say.
• Having an intellectual understanding of your emotions does not mean you are connected to them.
• We feel accepted when we stop playing a role.

4: Mate by Tucker Max & Geoffrey Miller

"Willpower is really just being as kind as you can to the man you want to become.”

Key takeaways:

• Confidence comes from demonstrated performance.
• The best way to find a partner is to find yourself.
• Attraction is an emotional, unconscious reaction to the suite of traits men present to women; it is NOT a conscious decision that they deliberate about.
• Women inherently feel more threatened than men when going on dates. Most men have zero awareness of this. 
• Where we live informs what kind of woman we'll meet.

5: Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins

“If you have worked for thirty years doing the same shit you’ve hated day in and day out because you were afraid to quit and take a risk, you’ve been living like a pussy."

Key takeaways:

• No one is responsible for me but me.
• Not doing anything is still a decision I made.
• I fear outcomes because I fear change.
• With time I will always see through my own bullshit
• David Goggins is a badass motherfucker.

6: Man's Search for Meaning by Victor E. Frankl

“No man should judge unless he asks himself in absolute honesty whether in a similar situation he might not have done the same.”

Key takeaways:

• Failing at something meaningful is much more rewarding than succeeding at something that's not.
• I am responsible for my outlook on any given situation, no matter the circumstances.
• Not choosing to pursue meaning means choosing to live a meaningless life.
• The only difference between me and someone I deem as "less than" is that they have suffered more.

Regards,

Nick

(1/18) Writing Prompt: How has 2021 been treating you so far? Write 500 words about your first half of January.