Hello from Belgium,
As I promised, here's another chapter of The Songs of You and Me. If you missed my previous email, go back to your inbox and search in the promotions tab or junk folder...
If you're new to my newsletter, here's a little recap. Every week, I'll be sending one chapter of my book The Songs of You and Me. If you would like to read the book in its entirety, it's available on Amazon or free in kindle unlimited.
I still remember going back and tweaking this chapter over and over, trying to get the right balance for the opening of this book. I wanted to have the emotions just right. For those of you who have read The Songs of You and Me, you’ll know what an emotional rollercoaster this read is. And there is a lot of hints to what this book is about all here in this first chapter. What happened to Jane? Who is Jackson? Why is he here now? What is Emma’s situation?
Just writing about this is making me want to go back and read it 
But I’ll focus on writing some more of Bellebrook for you 
Happy Reading!
JANE
I rolled over and stretched out, feeling a smile form on my lips. My hand reached out to David’s side, and instead of finding his warm body next to me, my hand fisted the cold, empty sheets. I’d been dreaming again. The sadness that was my regular companion these past two and a half years started to make another appearance.
I rubbed my face in an attempt to clear the bleakness, still surprised at how real he seemed in my dreams. His darkish blond hair looked longer, as if it needed a trim. And those startling blue eyes of his reminded me of our daughter Emma. I was so glad he passed them on to her. Thoughts of Emma lifted my spirits and dragged me out of bed and down the hall to her room.
“Wake up, sleepyhead.” I pushed the blonde curls from my almost six-year-old daughter’s sleepy face and watched her yawn and stretch in bed. “I’m not kidding, Emma. It’s time to wake up. Today is your big day.”
She hopped out of bed, the realization spurring her on. Like a whirlwind, she ran to the bathroom and stripped off her pajamas. Her excited chatter bubbled over, a steady stream of what she planned to do today fired off a little too loud this early in the morning. My stomach clenched, a dull ache settling as my thoughts drifted again.
David should have been here to share this special moment with us. I blinked, forcing the tears not to spill. Today was a happy day.
“Come on, Mommy,” Emma called, pulling me out of my funk. This ball of energy reminded me so much of her dad. “Nana and Pops will be here soon.” Her toothbrush was stuck in her mouth, a small stream of toothpaste running over her chin.
“You are absolutely right. I better get started on breakfast.”
With the last of the plates put on the table, the creak of the back door opening put a smile on my face. Emma raced into my dad’s arms.
“Hi, sweetheart.” My mom pushed one of Emma’s unruly curls out of her face. She leaned in to kiss Emma’s cheek, my dad still holding her tight.
“Come in.” I loaded up their plates with a thick stack of pancakes and an extra portion of bacon for Dad. “We better eat while the food’s still hot.”
Emma and my dad shared a joke, and they both burst out into a fit of giggles.
“How are you feeling?” Dad raised an eyebrow. Seated at the table, with the scent of fresh blueberry pancakes filling the air, I could feel my empty stomach grumble. Dad gave me a steadying smile. “It’s an important day for you, too, kid.”
David had always insisted I stay at home with Emma. With her starting school this year, it felt right to return to teaching.
The nervous butterflies took flight in my tummy. I set my fork down, suddenly unable to swallow another bite. “If the preparation I did this summer is any indication, I’ll be fine.” I cleaned my plate, dumping the last of my breakfast down the drain.
“You’ll do amazing, Jane. You are a natural. Don’t you forget it.” Mom’s words released some of the nervous tension building inside. My parents’ faith in me was a driving force in my life. I don’t know what I would do without their love and support. It meant the world to me to have them in my life, back then, and also now. I couldn’t have survived that kind of loss without them.
Emma’s kindergarten was a few blocks away from our home in Bellebrook, New York, the town I had called home all my life. Driving the short distance to her school, I soaked up the rays of sunshine we were enjoying this warm September, Emma singing along to her favorite song playing on the radio.
Dropping off Emma was much easier for her than for me. Apart from her grip tightening as we walked across the playground, she continued to be her bubbly, chatty self.
Miss Matthews, her teacher, was aware of Emma’s situation, and seemed to have taken a liking to her in the short meeting we had over the summer.
After a quick hug and kiss, Emma sprinted off in the direction of the toys, leaving me with empty arms.
The nervous energy from this morning returned as I made my way to the high school. The drive was only five minutes from Emma’s school but dragged as my heart rate picked up. I took a few more calming breaths, parked in the teacher’s parking lot, and found my way to my classroom.
Luck would have it that my first class didn’t start until second period, leaving me a few more minutes before I was thrown into the deep end. Luck also happened to come in the form of my best friend, Sarah, the vice principal at Bellebrook High. I owed her a lot. I was sure she would find some way for me to make it up to her, because that was the way our relationship worked.
Just as I thought the stress might force my breakfast to reappear, Sarah popped in.
“How you doing?” Sarah perched herself on the desk in front of mine. She looked the part of a vice principal, dressed in a navy pencil skirt and cream blouse, her dark brown hair pulled back in a tight bun.
“I think I might lose my breakfast any minute. How about you?” I faked a smile.
“Come on, they’re just a bunch of freshmen. What’s the worst they can do?” She smiled, not realizing the mental image she painted with that question.
“Don’t even go there. You know I have a vivid imagination.” I could already imagine myself stuck to a chair, struggling to get up, only to discover my butt glued to my chair. I mentally reminded myself not to sit down. Teenagers could be brutal!
“You’ll be fine. You were always such a natural.” Sarah’s warm smile set me at ease. “So, how did Emma do?”
“She was a little nervous. Then she saw the toys and sprinted off, barely time for a goodbye. I wish it would be as easy for her momma.” I heard my voice crack but covered it up by brushing away an imaginary piece of lint on my skirt.
But I couldn’t fool the person who’d been my best friend for over two decades. When I looked back up at her, all traces of sentiment erased from my face, she threw me off balance with her keen observation. “Hey, you did great this morning. I can’t imagine how hard it is doing this alone. Cut yourself some slack, okay? You got through the hard part. All downhill from here, I promise.”
“And you know this how?” I cocked my head to the side and raised my brows.
“I googled it, in anticipation of this moment.” She shrugged her shoulders and held her hands up.
“Of course you did.” I shook my head, fighting back a grin at her attempt to make me smile.
“Stick with me. I’ve got you covered.” Sarah’s attitude put a genuine smile on my face.
The bell rang, announcing the end of first period. Soon my classroom would fill up with twenty-five freshmen for English 101.
“Don’t forget, we’re having lunch together. I want to hear all about your first day back on the job,” she called out over her shoulder.
The next three periods passed in a blur as I met the three freshman classes, tried to learn their names, got a feel for the students, and introduced them to the syllabus we would be using this year. Thank heavens I spent a big part of this summer preparing. I didn’t think I’d ever return to teaching if I didn’t have all that time to help me get ready. Teaching English hadn’t changed that much in the seven years I’d been gone, but considering the time gap, I was still nervous coming back.
As the bell rang to announce the end of class and the start of my lunch break, I collected the handouts I needed to copy and made my way to the staff’s lunchroom to meet up with Sarah. When I got there, I couldn’t find her. After getting my pages copied and talking to a few colleagues, I walked over to her office. If there was one thing you could always count on, it was Sarah losing track of time.
“Forget about our lunch date so soon, did you?” I laughed to myself.
Before I knew what was happening, I plowed into a tall, broad figure. My hands dropped the papers I held and latched onto the wall of muscle in front of me. I peered up to see who saved me from a disastrous fall. That dark hair with a slight wave, those deep blue eyes—suddenly I was transported back to when I was fifteen. All these years hadn’t hurt him one bit. Jackson Wright was still as handsome as ever.
“Jackson?” I cringed, hating how my voice came out sounding sort of breathless.
“Hi, Jane. Let me help you.” He bent down to start collecting the mess of papers. My frazzled nerves froze me on the spot. I awoke from my shock and joined him. He leaned to pick up the last page, and that faint hint of cologne tugged at those memories from when we were teenagers. The scent of bergamot and sandalwood reminded me of that summer long ago. I looked up at him and swallowed the lump forming in my throat.
“I can’t seem to remember us having lunch plans.” Jackson chuckled. His face broke out in a wide grin as he helped me up. His strong hand wrapped around my arm, and my stomach jolted. I shuffled the papers, breaking the contact and covering the heat creeping up in my face.
“Why, Jackson, if I would have known you were in town, I would have penciled you in. As it so happens, I already have plans this afternoon.” I patted myself on the back for my quick recovery.
Before he could reply, Sarah entered from the side door and picked up her conversation with Jackson as if she never left the room.
“I copied this, and here is that number you’ll need for the carpenter. Oh!” She looked almost genuinely surprised to see me, but I knew better. I could tell she planned this moment too well. “I see you ran into Jane.” Ran being the right word. Knowing Sarah, she “happened” to plan this lunch date with me and her meeting with Jackson at the same time so we could “happen” to bump into each other.
Judging by the sly smile on her lips, I knew I was spot on. I’d get back at her for this.
“Jane, Jackson moved back to Bellebrook last week. I guess I forgot to mention that.” Sarah winked, trying to unsuccessfully hide a smile.
“Sure you did.” I rolled my eyes, the action lost on Sarah.
“He’ll be doing some work for the school. You remember he’s an architect, right? His old employer did the previous expansion.” She didn’t wait for an answer. “When they found out he was considering moving back here to set up his own business, they recommended him to the board. He’s finally at the point where he needs to be here full time to complete the planned expansion. Isn’t it great? It’ll be just like old times.”
My attention was drawn to Jackson. He looked as good as I remembered. No, better.
“We should go get something to eat before classes start up.” Sarah collected her bag, indicating it was time to leave.
“I’ve got to run, sis. Got an appointment with a client in twenty.” Jackson hugged Sarah goodbye and turned to leave. He faltered when he noticed me. He smiled before making his way to the door. He stopped as he reached the hallway. I swallowed as I looked back at him.
“Uh.” He lifted his hand in a wave but dropped it. ”See ya, Jane.”
Sarah and I walked out of the office, leaving in the opposite direction. At the end of the hall, I turned back and stared at his retreating form. Seeing Jackson again after all this time hit me like a punch to the gut. As I was about to round the corner, he turned around. For a moment, our eyes locked. Something seemed to pass between us. As I puzzled to make out what that might be, he disappeared around the corner. I stood there, feeling all kinds of funny. My mind shifted back to that night when I fell utterly, hopelessly in love with him.
I hope you have a wonderful day, and stay tuned for more next week. 😊
Don't want to wait until next week to keep reading? Get the book in Amazon today, or borrow in Kindle Unlimited.
Lots of love,
M
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