Continuing on our journey of understanding avoidance. 

Here is a brief narration of my lived experiences, assuming avoidance can solve it all

• When my aunt died due to sudden cardiac arrest, I was in the basement of the hospital making payments. Words cannot describe what she meant to me, and when I learned she passed away, I made a hundred excuses to go to the floor, where her dead body was getting ready to be transferred back home. 
• When my father was diagnosed with chronic heart failure, I would peek into the report but many a times could never muster the courage to read the findings.
• When a toxic boss emotionally abused me at work, I became quieter than before.

The common denominator in all these cases was deep fear; it had no name, it had no description, it stayed glued to me like an unforgiving curse!

&

I remain fearful.

I am not a coward, but a highly sensitive person who stays stuck in complex emotions for too long. Therefore, my brain, with each difficult trial of life, learned to survive by seeking a safety mechanism.

The safety mechanism sometimes came as avoidance and sometimes as endurance.

What it lacked was confrontation, an approach where one is supported by another human.

We often don’t avoid change because it’s wrong—we avoid it because fear makes staying the same feel safer.

What are you avoiding lately?

Is it something you need support to look at with someone you trust?

Here's an invite to join the safest place at the most reasonable cost, so that you finally find a way out of it

Click here to enroll

This week — if you feel called — sit with this one question:

What is the one thing I am carrying right now that I have never said out loud to anyone?

You don't have to answer it to me. Just answer it for yourself. On paper, if you can. Let the words come without editing them.

That is enough. For now, that is everything.

Warmly,

Mehnaz Amjad 

PS : Have you seen this? First aid for the neglected self , I'm sure you may not want to miss this one.