Ya know all those reels and tweets or threads where people say something wry like news flash: taking a walk actually does help with your mental health or turns out you’ve got to write to finish your WIP? Well, I’ve got a new one.
Breaking news: turns out you’re actually more capable than you think and have accomplished more than you realized.
Now this is not the first time I’ve encountered this revolutionary idea. Actually, I kinda grew up hearing something similar under the form of you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. Disney fans may recognize that as a line from one of my top favourite films, “Winnie the Pooh’s Most Grand Adventure: The Search for Christopher Robin.” You’d think that with all the dozens of times I’ve watched that gem (I even wrote a whole blog post analyzing the theme here), the message would have soaked in a little. However, true to my Irish and Québécois ancestors, I am a stubborn woman, and something I’ve always been convinced of is my inherent lack of... well, value, to be brutally honest.
Over the years, as the Lord slowly delivered me from chronic depression, I began to recognize some of the devil’s lies about my worth and to fight back armed with my deliverer’s word. But there are some things that are so deep-seated you just can’t really accept they’re false. And two of those things were I’m stupid and I’m super far behind + wasted my whole life. Being neurodivergent without knowing it for 90% of my life and having internalized shame over cruel or careless words seeped in legalism contributed to both issues, which is part of why they were so difficult to uproot.