Welcome to the December 27th edition of Faith & Life Lessons.
You will see this email full of tidbits from my week. My goal is simple. I hope that from how I live my life, you can find a thing or two that helps you as you try to live a life that matters. I am always trying to do one thing - make Christ-focused decisions in love, work, and life. And this was my week.
The Story Of My Week
Merry Christmas to you.
One of the things my wife and I decided on was to create Christmas traditions that our kids could look forward to every Christmas season.
Our traditions were just a couple of activities that we could do together as a family.
On 24th, we went around town to see the Christmas decorations and take a couple of pictures. At night, I read the story of Jesus' birth to the kids.
Christmas morning was a family breakfast after they had opened the gifts. We also had a Jesus Birthday Cake - we sang happy birthday to Jesus and blew out the candles.
My son sort of sneaked in a tradition into the mix. Most of the week, he had been asking about Santa.
As dear daddies do, I put on the Santa's costume on Christmas morning.
It was going so well until someone started wondering "where is daddy?" and then my jig was up.
Anyhow, it mattered to the kids at this stage of life to see a Santa. Eventually, they will grow out of it. But they will not grow out of the value of family traditions grounded in activities that bound the family.
I hope to keep doing that as the years roll in.
Things I Learnt
1-Christmas in a COVID Normal: I heard a pastor say that COVID has taught many pastors to be adaptable almost every week. Services and church activities have to be adjusted to the latest health advisory
Christmas has been no different
My church leadership went an unusual route for the Christmas Eve service.
Instead of a congregational service, they had 4 points in the church that people could come, share the communion with a pastor, light the Christmas candles, and pray together.
You had to book your slot and it went on for about 10-15 minutes.
It was an intimate approach to adapting to difficult times.
I liked it.
I can imagine that it must have been a huge endeavor for the pastors as they were on their feet meeting with different groups of people for about 2 hours.
But these times call for a deeper connection with people. Asking people to share their prayers is a great way to know the pain-points in the congregation.
Difficult times call for more flexibility
I have a feeling that 2021 would still require the same of that
As a leader in my office, I’ll need to do more of that with my team
If there was ever a time to lead and serve with compassion, now is the time.
2-When Another one Bites the Dust: I read the report of another Christian leader involved in sexual misconduct.
This was a person I have respected his ministry for years. He died earlier in the year and some of the accusations came up after his death.
There was one that came out about 3 years earlier which he paid the accuser $250,000 and signed a non-disclosure agreement with her to settle.
The ministry took the path of integrity and appointed an independent firm to investigate the accusations.
The preliminary report confirms the truth in the accusations. His daughter, who heads the ministry, has issued a statement confirming the same.
It was a shock to everyone because his public character was very much at variance with all these.
When I read it, I was reminded of the need to guard myself. If he fails, I can also fail.
I remember an article by Greg Stier about a small pastor’s conference he attended as a young pastor.
The speaker was an expert at counseling struggling pastors. He had shepherded hundreds of spiritual shepherds from all across America, many of whom had fallen into sexual immorality of some sort or another. He was at this conference to help pastors fight against the insidious enemy called “lust” and to perserve the integrity of their lives and the pulpits they preach from on a weekly basis.
After he was introduced he took the podium and asked the question, “How many of you pastors have some sort of boundaries when it comes to counseling members of the opposite sex? For instance, you won’t counsel a woman alone or with the door of your office shut or something like that?”
Almost all pastors present raised to their hands.
They speaker responded, “I’ve counseled hundreds of pastors all across America who have fallen into sexual sin and every single one of them had safeguards and boundaries in place.”
He continued, “Here’s the problem gentlemen, you can have all the safeguards you want. You can choose not to counsel a woman alone and refuse to be in a car by yourself with a member of the opposite sex. But LUST WILL PICK A LOCK. Lust will find a way to work around the safeguard and feed its ravenous hunger for satisfaction.” He continued, “The only real safeguard is a strong relationship with Jesus Christ and a strong relationship with your wife. Everything else is just window dressing.”
This is why I keep praying to be faithful - to God and my wife.
When it was our turn to meet our pastors during my church’s Christmas Eve service, I had just 2 prayers. The first was for God to keep my family throughout my travels and the second was for me to remain faithful to my marriage covenant.
I don’t intend to fall but I know I can fall.
This keeps me humble and trusting
Every day, I want to love God and my wife better
They remain my best guardrails against sexual failings
Postscript
May God stir courage in your heart so you go out with His confidence to face whatever challenges every moment brings your way. May you face them with peace and assurance that the outcome will always turn out for God’s glory if you don’t give up on His Word (Amen)
Tata,
Tola
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