Carolina Perez Sanz, PhD by Carolina Perez Sanz

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#113 – If 'enduring' brings you down, what's the alternative?

The energy of 'enduring' is low

#113 – If 'enduring' brings you down, what's the alternative?

I used to think (or feel, or believe) that 'enduring' was a great concept. In my mind, it spoke of resiliency, stoicism, anti-fragility.


Maybe because I was into endurance running, and the long hours, thousands of steps, and miles and miles under the sun made me feel somehow superhuman.


I'm not arguing against the appeal of that sort of activity.


What I want to dispute is the value of 'enduring' in day-to-day life. Why endure conversations that bore you to death, jobs that drain your spirit hour by hour, or relationships that sap your energy?


I'm also not proposing that the only way to stop enduring is to leave, quit, or break up.


Here's a question: what's different for you when you think of 'embracing' instead of 'enduring?'


For me, 'embracing' triggers curiosity. It brings a smile to my face and a mental hand-wringing in anticipation. An okay, let's do it! type of attitude.


Whereas 'enduring' feels heavy, like a gravestone on my back keeping me flat on the ground. Like needing to grasp for air.


This thought made me think: in a difficult situation, such as the one our family is in these days, what feels more spacious?


Do we endure, hoping to come out the other way more or less unscathed?


Or do we embrace and make the most out of it, knowing that the only way out is through?


When has embracing a difficult life situation made all the difference in your happiness?


Love,

Carolina

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