#370 – Who will you be when you truly forgive?

When you've been hurt, not forgiving the person who hurt you is like vying to remain stuck in that past moment.

Yesterday, I told a friend the whole story about how my son ended up in jail. What the doctor did to me. The conversation I had with my son about it. What my son intended by speaking with said doctor. What he did to my son. What my son ended up doing to him.

While giving her the details, I realized some language I felt "forced" to use sounded outdated, as if my present self were in a different wavelength than the person who'd created that narrative. But it'd been a while since I'd told that story, so I hadn't revisited it.

Suddenly, hearing my voice speaking those words into the mic of my headset, there was noise. Dissonance, lack of coherence.

Those words reflected my "hurt," the grudge I held against that man.

But after nine months working on forgiving him, they were no longer true to who I am today. Today, I'm someone who doesn't feel anything about that doctor because I'd let him go from my mind. And because of that, I'm no longer his hostage.

That's the true reward of forgiveness: it sets you free to become who you want to become. It doesn't help the other person heal or be happier or go to heaven or win a trip to Disneyland.

Forgiveness is the gift you give your present self so that it can evolve into the greater being you can become.

Who will you forgive so that you take one more step towards your more evolved self?

Love,

Carolina