Hi ~

I get questions about forgiveness all the time. Seems like it’s one of the biggest things on my readers' minds.

"How do I forgive?" 

"What does forgiveness really mean and what does it include?" 

"How do I deal with weaponized forgiveness?"

Things like that.

You can see every article I and my guest authors have written on the topic here.

But for now . . .

Jesus does emphasize forgiveness, so clearly it's an important goal. But we don't necessarily need to get to it first.

There's a bigger picture to see first: untwisting the Scriptures that got twisted against you, learning what God is actually like, learning who you actually are in Him. 

Layers and layers. Forgiveness is just one part.

Being told to hurry up and forgive, to stop being bitter, to let it go before you’ve even been able to clearly see what happened to you . . . that can make things worse. It deserves the same slow, careful untangling as everything else.

You may think you can forgive by gritting your teeth and willing forgiveness into existence. And maybe to some degree, you can.

But the genuine release comes as the outflow of a heart that has started to believe the truth: that God is not an abuser, that He is not on the abuser's side, and that He truly loves you.

When that starts to take root, forgiveness stops being a rule you're failing to keep. It just starts to flow, on its own.

That can be slow. It may even hurt more before it hurts less. But it will come.

So many survivors have told me about the growth that came out of the hard, dark stretches they walked through.

I haven't experienced what many of them have. But I've had my own hard and dark places, and I know the Lord doesn’t do the horrible things. He's not the source of the wound.

And when you keep looking to Him through it, He can bring beauty out of ashes. That's what He delights in doing.

If there’s a wall in front of you right now--I should forgive but I can't--know that wall isn't supposed to be the starting line.

Start with "God, who are You, really? And how do You see me?"

And watch what He does. And see how it changes you.

That's what the entire Untwisting Scriptures series is for.

Praying for you as the Lord does His slow and careful work,

Rebecca

Untwisting Scriptures at heresthejoy.com

See my Untwisting Scriptures series

Trauma-informed Christian book coach at Rebecca Davis WordWorking

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