You Should Be Anxious. I tell you why inside.
May 12, 2022 11:01 am
Hi,
May is Mental Health Awareness month and I am so glad it isn't called mental illness prevention month. Mental health, like physical health, is more than the absence of illness. Just as athletes strive to be physically elite in physical skills, strength, endurance, and agility (all measures of health), so too we can work to be above average in emotional control, focus, energy and passion (all measures of mental health).
So my first article below reminds you why you should be anxious. You aren't broken. You just care a whole lot. And it can be a part of your mental health.
Below that I have a link to a recent radio interview where I got to elaborate again on lessons from the NFL Draft and the role of faith in sport.
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I Should What?!?
Enjoy this article from East Grand Rapids Living reprinted below if easier to read :-) ...
"If you are a high-performer, I want to defend your anxiety. Because in my 20+ years as a sport and performance psychologist I have learned that your anxiety is necessary and beneficial.
Your anxiety isn’t the problem, it is how you react to anxiety that’s the problem.
Let me explain …
Your mind has one job: to warn you of danger. It is our survival instinct. Turtles have shells, porcupines have quills, skunks have sprays and we have a mind that looks out into the world and tells us what could go wrong, not what will.
In this way worry is our survival instinct.
If I wasn’t afraid of getting hit by a car, I wouldn’t look both ways before crossing the street.
If I wasn’t afraid of failing, I wouldn’t study.
If I wasn’t afraid of losing, I wouldn’t practice.
Anxiety alerts us to potential (not probable) danger so we can take protective action.
Staying in anxiety without taking action is where the problem lies. Ruminating about what can go wrong actually causes it to go wrong because your focus is not on what you need to do for it to go right!
We worry most about what we care the most about. This is why I work with top athletes sometimes crippled by perfectionism or fear of failure. They actually have a much lower chance of losing or making a mistake, but they care so deeply about their performance, the anxiety comes out of that emotional investment.
The more you care, the more it will hurt you if it doesn’t go well. So the more you will worry about it. Not because the likelihood is greater, but because the pain will be greater if the worst happens because your level of investment is greater.
This is why I say you should worry. Trying not to worry increases anxiety because your mind knows it is unsafe to ignore threats. So lean into your anxiety, see what it is trying to tell you, and choose your response:
- if the feared outcome is likely, then take action steps to prepare for a better outcome
- if it is unlikely, know your mind is just doing it’s job and remind yourself you can’t believe everything you think!"
Find me here for individual consults for additional help.
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Listen Now!
The Sports Professor Steve Project welcomed me on the Sports Project Radio Show to discuss the NFL Draft. I discussed how and why some later round draft picks have more success than more talented first round players. (Hint: less talented players that succeed have better learned how to work hard, overcome and persist through adversity).
Note: If you caught the earlier newsletter on these same topics, you will really enjoy the elaboration in the interview.
The key to success is investment in deliberate practice. (I details what that looks like in the interview, but in short it involves 3 steps within every repetition: focus on exactly what you want to do; get feedback on your performance; then identify something specific to fix on the next repetition, and repeat.)
Then the conversation pivots to how Scripture helps Christian athletes better manage their anxiety. When athletes keep God at the center of their lives, sport is put into a more accurate perspective and the pressure decreases. Several verses provide specific instruction on how to interact with our anxiety (e.g., Philippians 4:6-7) and when these verses are put into action, mood improves. There is an overlap between the science of sport psychology and biblical teachings. Steve and I discuss performing for an audience of One, and debate if your spirituality is your next opportunity to enhance your success and performance, or if it is better to put God first and let your performance flow out of that relationship.
Athletes from other faiths are encouraged to see how their religious beliefs may provide guidance for their distress and performance. This may provide greater motivation to interact with anxiety differently than reliance on science alone (especially when science and religion are consistent).
For example, a friend in our email community, Redouane, shared these passages from the Muslim Quran and added these words of encouragement, applying them to anxiety:
2:153: O you who have believed, seek help though patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.
"Patience is difficult, but it is important. Combined with prayer and remembrance of Allah, patience will help you get through the tough times to see that the pieces that were once all up in the air fell into place..."
13:28: Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.
"Prayer and meditation can help one feel calm."
and
15:85: Indeed with hardship comes ease.
"Allah (GOD) has spoken about being tested in the Quran; This world is for tests, and with these tests we will grow as people and grow closer to Him. He has also promised that there will be ease after every hardship. Look forward to that, know that the situation you are in won’t be forever, that you will get through it and that it will feel amazing when you do."
Listen to the end of the interview for a final and most helpful focus tip!
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Dr. Eddie O’Connor
