I did it because it was hard
Sep 03, 2022 3:25 pm
Happy Holiday Weekend,
First up is a lesson I learned from my race in West Virginia.
And then can you guess the exercise I had coaches do at GVSU this week?
Enjoy the last weekend of summer,
Dr Eddie
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Because It Was Hard
So I just completed a 7+ mile, 28 obstacles, Super Spartan Race in West Virginia (which has a lot of mountains). It was hard.
I got asked, "why'd you do it?"
I did it because it was hard ... because I wanted these benefits:
1) When you do hard things, you're going to grow. Just like in weightlifting, when you lift heavy, hard, difficult weights, it is the difficult resistance that makes you stronger. When you do hard things you will grow physically, mentally and emotionally.
2) Confidence isn't really a psychological state. I prefer to think of it as the natural side effect of preparation. So when you do something difficult, you can't help but to have more confidence because your competence has improved.
3) I believe that doing hard things increases your motivation. The Self Determination Theory of motivation states there are three psychological needs: competence, autonomy, and relatedness. And when competence is high, we have greater motivation because we have the sense that we are good at something so we are motivated to do it (or other hard things) again. ... How good would that be for you? If you had more motivation to tackle the tough stuff in your life?
4) When you do hard things, it separates you from others. Some people are just not willing to engage the difficult things. Your willingness to do the hard thing will put you ahead of many other people.
5) (This is the one that I want you to think of before you do the hard thing) Recognize how much sweeter it is when you finish it. Not from a relief standpoint, but from that sense of accomplishment. There is a richness to being on the other side of the difficulty. How good it feels to have done something difficult and come out on the other side! The results that you have now gained are just that much sweeter.
If you want help doing hard things, join us in Success Stories Membership.
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What Are They Doing?
Many thanks to GVSU Lakers for having me in to teach their coaches "๐๐ผ๐ ๐ง๐ผ ๐ฆ๐๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ฑ. ๐ก๐ผ ๐ ๐ฎ๐๐๐ฒ๐ฟ. ๐ช๐ต๐ฎ๐."
Sport involves a lot of negative emotions. If we are driven to avoid or change them, we become distracted and both performance and mental health suffer.
In this workshop, I led them through a series of experiential exercises so they could ๐ง๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ญ acceptance, willingness, and the independence of their thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Any guesses as to what they are doing in the picture?
They tap their head while saying โI canโt tap my head!โ It illustrates the independence of thoughts, feelings and actions. So when athletes think they NEED to think positive or feel confident SO THAT they can play well, we can remind them that our actions are not dependent on specific thoughts and feelings. We can commit to values actions and bring the unpleasant negative internal experiences along with us โฆ there was a lot more to it in the 60-min presentation, but that gives you the gist of it ๐
Let me present to your coaches and athletes this season. Click Here
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Dr. Eddie OโConnor
