Answers to your "What if ...?" Questions
Dec 23, 2022 12:46 pm
Hi,
"What if ... (insert something scary here)?"
This is a common question that produces a lot of anxiety. And we tend to get stuck in this "what if ...?" thinking asking one question after another.
Check out my articles below on how to interrupt this line of questioning and restore both your focus and confidence.
Have a very merry Christmas weekend too!
Dr. Eddie
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"But what if ...?"
The most anxiety provoking question may be "What if ...?"
The reason it creates anxiety is because we unconsciously assume the worst possible answer and feel the consequences in the moment.
For example, when we ask, "What if I make a mistake?" we immediately feel as if the mistake has already been made and experience negative emotions such as embarrassment or shame.
Anxiety increases as we ask one "what if" question after another, compounding the negative experience!
The truth is, many of these "what if" scenarios could happen. So rather than try to stop worrying about it, answer the question!
What if you did make a mistake? What is your plan to to correct it?
What if you did let your teammates down? How would you respond?
What if you didn't make the team? What would you do next?
You will find that by answering the "what if" questions with an action plan, your anxiety will go down and your confidence will go up due to preparation.
If what you are afraid of 𝘥𝘪𝘥 happen ... could you handle it?
This is the more important question.
Many of our fears such as losing, making a mistake, not making the team, and getting injured have a high likelihood of happening at some point. It isn't a matter of "what if?" but "when?"
So when you start to worry about all the "what if ..." negative scenarios, take a moment to imagine it does happen. Then what would you do? Could you handle the consequences?
Can you handle the loss? (Probably, as you've handled it before)
Can you handle the mistake? (Definitely, as you've handled it before)
Can you handle not making the team? (You will be sad, and have managed disappointment before)
Can you handle the injury? (You will hurt, and you will heal)
You won't like any of these experiences (nor should you) AND you have the resilience to get through them.
So when you ask, "but what if 'X' happens?" answer with how you will handle it.
You'll train harder to increase your chances of winning.
You'll make the correction and learn from your mistake.
You will find another team and have a great season.
You will apply yourself to rehab and come back stronger.
For help with anxiety and focus,
join us inside Success Stories Membership.
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Not just for athletes ... apply these principles to music, art, business and any context in which you want to excel.
Available in video or audiobook.
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Dr. Eddie O’Connor
