Exactly how to slow your mind down
Dec 10, 2022 12:26 pm
Hi,
Two videos this week for you.
The first teaches a couple practical strategies to slow down the overthinking. And the second is more specific when it's keeping you up at night.
Enjoy and get some rest,
Dr. Eddie
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Slow Overthinking Down
You ever get so stressed about wanting an outcome so badly (to to win the game, or make the team or, get a good grade on a test) that all you can do is think about it? Many athletes will tell me that they're too much in their head, overthinking everything, because they want a result so badly.
Here's why you're doing it.
When we overthink, it feels like we're doing 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦thing. "Look how much I care about this. I can't get it outta my head. I'm thinking, thinking, thinking!"
But the big problem with that is that it's just keeping us stuck in our head and our games, our sports, and our grades are happening on the outside.
So suggestion number one ... when you're stuck inside, get outside.
When you're all in this thinking, get out and do something that's actually going to make a difference.
Another reason that we overthink is it's an attempt to control. Again, we want this desired outcome and we want to do everything we can to control it. And so this extra energy and effort we're putting into thinking about it is just misplaced because we don't control the outcomes.
What we do control is the process. So when we're stuck on the future thinking and trying to control what we want to have happen later on, bring yourself back into the moment - the right here, right now - and identify what is it that you do as part of the process to influence the outcome that you want.
You do have control over the process: your effort, your focus, what you decide to do. Put all your attention and energy there.
And if you want some more help with overthinking, mindfulness is really the way to go. Mindfulness training (the ability to pay attention on purpose in the present moment without judgment), and more specifically what I like to call "mindfulness of the mind" (the ability to objectively observe your thoughts and feelings) are both inside Success Stories Membership. So if you want some assistance, join us on the inside with other high achievers just like you, overcoming these obstacles to excellence. I hope to see you in there soon.
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Sleep Well the Night Before
You ever have trouble falling asleep the night before, staying awake with worry?
I'm going to guess yes, because that's what our mind does. It's actually built to worry, especially about the things that we care the most about, because those are the things that could hurt us the most. So when we're ready to go to bed and we've got a big event or game or or meeting the next day, our mind is going to wander and tell us all the things that could go wrong. So I have a couple strategies for you about what to do instead.
And the first one is to focus in on why you're actually prepared for the event the next day. Again, knowing that your mind is actually built to wander and worry about things as a way to prepare you for danger and warn you about it, you can kind of let your mind know that, "okay, I've already got this taken care of." By reflecting on the great practices that you've had, the preparation that you've done, and by knowing that your mind is built to worry, you don't have to take it quite as seriously.
You ever just have somebody in your life that you don't really want to pay attention to? You don't have to have them be quiet, although you would like them to, but you just let them become background noise? Well, that's how your worry at night can be. You can just take pride in knowing that your mind is caring about what is going to happen tomorrow, but you don't really have to pay attention to it. You can focus on the things that you've done and know that you're ready.
But part two of this is to ask yourself, "have I done everything I can to be prepared?" And if you haven't, then get up and do it! For example, if it's earlier in the night and you're starting to worry and you haven't studied for that test, get up and do some studying. Or if you're preparing for an event the next day, do you have everything packed? Can you get up and get your clothes ready for the next day? Have your lunch prepared. Have your training bag packed, your snacks ready. Things you could do that would help calm your mind, get up and do them.
Most of the time it's going be too late. And so, at the very least, make a list of things that you'd have to do the following morning so you can quiet your mind knowing that everything is checked off, and realizing that you've done everything you can up to this point.
So the next big strategy is to focus on getting a good night's sleep, understanding that while your mind is built to worry, it's serving you no good, and the very best thing that you can do is allow yourself to relax and get a good quality night's sleep so that you can be best prepared for tomorrow.
The worst thing you can do is to fight with your anxiety and try to ignore it and try to make yourself calm down. In fact, do the opposite. Lean into it with these three steps.
One, check and make a list of how you know that you are actually prepared.
Number two, if you're not prepared, get prepared. Either make a list of what you have to do tomorrow or get it done right now.
And number three, lean into the relaxation as a way to prepare yourself for sleep in preparation for the event the next day.
Learn how to sleep better tonight so you can play better tomorrow with the "Sleep Your Way to the Top" workshop here.
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Dr. Eddie O’Connor
