Several years ago I met a fellow mother whose younger daughter has a very rare neurological disease. As we became close friends, I noticed all sorts of people gave her advice on how to deal with this scary, unknown illness. Even casual strangers were telling my friend, "Oh, you should try this," Or "My cousin does this with her kid." All the unsolicited advice wore her down because not even the specialists knew how to handle this illness. Her kid was unfortunately learning along with the doctors. What these well-meaning people didn't realize is that they were putting incredible pressure on my overwhelmed friend. She felt she had to try harder, that if only she focused, she could conjure the perfect solution to her child's problems.
So one day when my friend was faced with a particularly rough choice deciding on treatment options, I just told her out of the blue that I thought she was a good mom and she was doing the best she could. That all the options suck, and in the end, it doesn't matter that she did "x" or "y," just that she loved her kid and gave it her best shot.
She thanked me profusely, telling me no one had ever told her that.
I see a lot of parallels in people dealing with COVID-19. We don't know a lot, but we have to make major decisions based on very little. And some people are doing this at the expense of their physical and mental health. It's tough. All the options suck.
So in case anyone needs to hear this:
I don't know you. I can't imagine what you're going through or what decisions you have to make in this mess, but I'd wager you're doing the best you can. This situation is tough, the answers are less clear than normal, and no matter how confident other people appear, they're probably struggling too.
There's plenty of advice out there that people can sort through. Heck, I’ve got my own two cents on what to do, but I definitely feel a lot more doubt than I let on. Sometimes, it’s better to toss your coins into the empathy bucket. It may get more mileage there.
Onto Less Heavy Stuff
I had the opportunity to talk with fellow urban fantasy writer Sami Valentine about her Red Witch Chronicles series. If you're interested about how a writer dreams up a snarky heroine embarking on a paranormal adventure with vampires, steam, and action, read the interview on my blog!
Free Books in Exchange for Reviews
Fantastic Fiction features a bunch of free books in exchange for an honest review. Being a newbie writer is tough, especially during a pandemic, so I've teamed up with other writers to offer free books to meet a mutual goal: help us receive more honest book reviews (which help build our budding reputations) and give you free content. I've got Chasing Lightning in there if you haven't had a chance to read it yet.
Disclaimer: This isn't like a normal book giveaway. The books here aren't in unlimited quantities. Due to Amazon's rules while books are in Kindle Unlimited, authors like myself had to buy copies of our own book to distribute. I also can only give free codes to people in the same country as me (the United States). So supplies are limited and I won't be able to give everyone a copy.
If you have questions, though, email me at [email protected]. I would love to give away at least a few free copies of Chasing Lightning to my newsletter list.
I promise to have a normal free short story giveaway in my next newsletter.
Until next time, happy adventuring!
-DM Fike
Magic of Nasci Fantasy Adventure Series (Ebook, Paperback, and Kindle Unlimited)
Running into Fire (Book 3) Ebook preorder now, KU and paperback on Sept. 2, 2020
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