"A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families." - Psalm 68:5-6
I think it’s one of the greatest ironies of the world we currently live in, that while we are more connected than we’ve ever been, somehow it seems that everybody’s lonely. One study found that loneliness is a widespread public health issue, affecting an estimated 52 million U.S. adults, more than 60% of adults reported feeling lonely. Even with social media, group chats, packed schedules, and being “connected” all the time, people are starving for real community. There are people all around us carrying quiet loneliness that nobody sees — the person sitting alone after church, the friend who always checks on everyone else but never gets checked on, the person smiling in every photo but going home feeling invisible. But in Psalm 68:5-6, it says God is “a father to the fatherless” and that He “sets the lonely in families.” God doesn’t ignore lonely people. He moves toward them. And if we’re believers? We should too.
You see, part of being the hands and feet of Jesus means realizing that community usually isn’t built through huge moments — it’s built through small acts of intentionality. A text. An invitation to dinner. Remembering someone’s name. Asking someone how they’re really doing and actually listening. How often do we say “How’s it going?” and barely even stop walking to hear the answer? The Church was never meant to just be a room full of people attending the same service; it was meant to be a family. Some of the most profoundly impactful moments you will ever experience within “church” shouldn’t even be in the walls of the church building, they should happen in ordinary moments where we choose to notice people who might otherwise feel forgotten.
And if you’re in a lonely season right now, I just want to remind you that loneliness is not proof that God has abandoned you. Some of the most faithful people in Scripture walked through deep loneliness, and even Jesus understands what it feels like to be rejected and misunderstood. Isaiah 53:3 says “He was despised and rejected by mankind.” God sees you fully, even if you feel overlooked by people. Don’t give up on connection. Don’t convince yourself nobody cares. And don’t stop caring for others in the meantime. The same God who “sets the lonely in families” is still writing stories of belonging every single day — and sometimes He starts with one person simply choosing to reach out. Don’t let your own loneliness stop you from being the first to cultivate family and community. In a world where everybody’s lonely, we get to be God’s hands and feet as He “sets the lonely in families.”
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2 comments
Flipping this sightly, is there a difference between lonely and friendless? A book from the 1980s, 'The Friendless American Male,' was eye opening and sort of painful. Men (especially) have acquaintances vs. friends. So many men don't know how to have or be a friend! In that situation, you may have lots of people "around," but still be very lonely. You would think men in the church would be the exception. Maybe sometimes. This might sound selfish: I have a recurring prayer item: "how can I be a better friend?"
Tom Greene must have been listening in on this conversation. What a coincidence that he just published this article: https://witwisdom.tomgreene.com/p/the-friendless-american