Hey
Kamusta? Have you ever had one of those days when you just feel - for lack of a better word - meh?
I am normally quite a positive and chirpy person, but a few weeks ago I had one of those days.
Yung tipong parang naungkat ko na yung buong cabinet ko but I still couldn’t find anything to wear. I just didn’t feel that I looked nice in anything...and looking back, I realized:
It wasn’t you, clothes. It was me.
For some reason, when I looked at the mirror that day, all I could see were my age/sun spots and the few remaining stretch marks I still had from having a baby last year. I just didn’t feel confident enough about myself that time.
You know what cheered me up? An e-numan session with my fellow Beyond Kilig-ers 😀
I was really just planning on dropping by that e-numan for a bit because for one, our internet was acting up and I was on data, and more importantly, because nga I was just feeling so ugly and un-sociable and I just wanted to hide under a rock.
I’m glad I decided to stay longer, though, because it was one of the most meaningful conversations I’ve had with friends in such a long time. All of us there just poured our hearts out and bonded about what brought us to TOB (Theology of the body). As the details of our conversation ran through my head while I was winding down that night, I kept thanking God because through this advocacy I was given the chance to meet such beautiful souls.
Our stories were so diverse, but we all seemed to have one thing in common:
We all went through some form of hardship or heartbreak that somehow broke us or left a void and it was TOB that helped us put the pieces back together and heal.
Our stories reminded me of kintsugi, or the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold and lacquer. The result is something like this:
Nice, no? What I love about kintsugi the most is the hope that it represents. That broken things are not worthless.
That flaws and imperfections can be beautiful. That all you need are patience and perseverance and you can put things back together, and the end result of that process of repair and transformation is a piece that is much more valuable and resilient than what you started out with.
We all have, at one point, probably wished we had more perfect, more Instagram-worthy lives. Some of us crave for more perfection in the physical aspect, in how we look; some of us naman have scars that are buried deep within — regrets, heartbreaks, misfortune — things we wished we could just forget about and pretend they never happened.
But if you think about it, all these characteristics and experiences are what make us, UNIQUELY us.
Something I read in Facebook a while back comes to mind. I can’t remember the exact words but it went something like: “Imagine, the God that made the skies and the mountains and the rivers and the seas thought that the world needed one of YOU too.”
We are all beautiful and unique and irreplaceable. Not ‘because of’, but ‘in spite of’. So if, like me, you have had one of those days, OR if today is, for you, one of those days, then repeat after me:
I am God’s work.
I am unique.
I am irreplaceable.
I am worthy.
I am enough.
May this mantra stay with you not just today but in all days when you feel you need an extra dose of positivity.
As always, I hope that as you go on your journey, you continue to love - NOT JUST OTHERS BUT ALSO YOURSELF - beyond kilig.
All the best,
Carla
Carla Villegas is a Cagayan de Oro-based educator. Her current classroom is the home where she teaches one subject - Life101 - to her four kiddos. She is passionate about lifelong learning, teaching, intentional parenting, and promoting real love. She combines these interests by giving talks and being involved in seminars and conferences for parents, teachers, and caregivers. She believes that well-formed guardians rear well-formed children.
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