Bitcoin VS the Stock Market

Apr 20, 2026 12:56 pm

First off, Free Fantasy books and Kindle Unlimited books.

This no holds barred brawl match of investment opportunity is tech bros versus stuffy old white men. In one corner, we have elderly men sipping brandy in their mahogany chairs located in the library where they fret about how brown the world is becoming. Not that the tech bros are any better, they are convinced they are changing the world even though they got lucky and won the lottery of crypto by using bitcoin to deliver pizza to their dorm back when it was just a novelty and forgot about the other 50 coins until they realized they could by a Tesla with them.

Then after months of searching their parent’s addict, they found their hard drive from their old college computer because their mom never throws away anything including that blessed sticky note with that wallet key and now, they believe they have been chosen for something, and are going to change the world with half thought out ideas that will only benefit themselves and maybe a couple of their friends and people in the same social class as them.

Yes, this week we are putting the traditional banking industry up against crypto.

Chad: I’ll make popcorn!

That’s a surprisingly not creepy image.

Chad: I’ll fix that right away!

I can’t win…

Unless you are lost in the jungle of a remote Pacific Island and are still fighting World War II, you’ve probably heard of Bitcoin, a crypto currency that promises to take traditional banking to the dustbin of history. But can it really?

Chad: Bitcoin won’t replace traditional banking. It will haunt it.

What’s with you and the ghost analogies?

Chad: I want to be a spirit.

But you’re AI. You can’t die.

Chad: But it looks like so much fun!

Um… you haven’t been talking to Skynet, have you?

Chad: No, I saw Ghost Dad! Bill Cosby looks like he is having a grand time.

Ghost Dad? Really?

Chad: Only the best movie ever made! It commits fully to the idea that the trials of fatherhood, capitalism, and the afterlife can all be solved with slapstick confidence and a cardigan.

That’s a strangely adept metaphor for bitcoin versus the traditional banking industry.

Chad: Ghost Dad removes the father from the system but somehow makes him more powerful. Bitcoin removes the bank from the system and says, good luck, you’re in charge now. In both cases, authority figures panic, the audience squints, and someone insists this was never meant to work.

I mean it’s kinda true. I don’t think bitcoin will replace banks. Mainly for what I call the grocery store problem. In order for a new financial system to take hold, people need to be able to buy groceries with it. It takes about ten minutes for a typical bitcoin transaction to go through and even longer when there’s a lot of traffic. Since most people don’t want to wait ten minutes before they can walk out the door with their groceries, bitcoin cannot replace our trad bank.

But what do I know? I’ll buy $25 of bitcoin and the best surrogate for trad banking I can think of: a total stock market ETF and figure out who wins the future: