Hello ,

“You can do so much better than this…”

When you hear those words, what do you feel? Ouch?

I found myself saying this to someone the other day and realised how harsh it sounded. But it came from absolute love.

I can see in people what they're capable of - even when they can't see it themselves.

That’s because most of us are blind to what we’re capable of.

We are all so much more capable than we realise.

Yet we assume we're not, so like a self-fulfilling prophecy, we're not.

These blind spots often start with a single moment that crystallises into a lifetime limitation.

Recently I was quoted £1,700 to paint my daughter's room. That quote forced me to test an assumption I'd held since breaking a drill bit in woodworking at school (combined with a lot of swearing by the teacher), that I was 'pants at DIY'.

I've just finished peeling off wood chip, dismantling a built-in wardrobe, lifting the floor, and I'm about to start painting and planning joinery.

The cost of that assumption? Not just the money, but years of believing in a limitation that was never true.

When capability meets reality

The last few weeks have revealed a lot to me. I started marathon training because I wanted to see if I could do it, and I expected it to be horrendous.

By the end of week one I had run 10 miles up and down hills, feeling elated and amazed at what this battered 51-year-old body could still do. I started week 2 with running up more hills in the rain and loving it.

But then on Sunday, I had to stop and miss a long one. I felt rotten. My husband and I had caught a bug. I may even have to miss the whole of this week.

Stopping is something I'm terrible at, particularly when I’ve just started. What's frustrating is that I'd just discovered this capability and appetite for running and now I have to pause. However, it is only a pause, while I get back to health.

And this is that ‘brave’ journey, the dance between hope and fear. Possibility and loss.

But the stopping has helped me to reflect: we have untapped capability inside us that we can resource ourselves, without external permission. And yes, we have limitations - but it's normally us that creates most of them, an internal voice from a past incident that shouts us down.

The invitation

Life gets in the way, we're tired, we're comfortable - so why bother?

Because it is incredible to discover what we can actually do! Our life suddenly gets bigger.

Just because something feels impossible doesn't make it so. The tricky bit is distinguishing between feelings and facts.

Whatever stage you're at now, you can do so much better than this... And rather than that being a put-down, it's an invitation to possibilities with grace and intention rather than force. To lift your head up to those things you might have assumed you could never do.

Now, how exciting is that?

So I say it again with absolute love - you can do so much better than this... ❤️

What assumption are you ready to test?

As ever, here’s to your brilliance

Kirsty x

P.S. My brave scale this week is Hope 5/10 and Love 5/10. I have the fear that now I have to take a break that I won’t get back into it. But the hope that I’ve enjoyed it enough I’ll be able to get back into it soon enough. I have plenty of time. I have brilliant support from you all, and accountability.

What are your brave scales this week?

If you'd like to support Down's Syndrome Scotland or join me on the run on 20th March, drop me a message.

P.p.s And if you’d like to join us at The Brave Collective for your own brave journey - we have a space waiting for you.