THEY Want You To Give Your Power Away: Say NO & Take Control!

Are you tired of feeling powerless in your own life? Do you constantly give your energy, time, and resources to others, only to feel frustrated and stuck?

If so, you’re not alone. Many of us unknowingly surrender our power every day by trying to please others instead of honoring our own needs and boundaries.

But here’s the truth: you have the power to take control of your life, and it starts with learning how to say NO and reclaim your personal strength.

In this writing, we will explore practical strategies to help you stop giving your power away, build self-confidence, and start living on your own terms.

Are You Giving Your Power Away?

Many people feel stuck because they are constantly giving their power away without even realizing it. Whether it’s saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” or sacrificing your own dreams to meet others’ expectations, this pattern can drain your energy and stall your progress.

When I was sixteen, during the summer, I got a job at an amusement park. Every morning, I would wake up early, get on the bus, and travel about an hour to work. I worked for 8 hours in the blistering sun, then rode the bus back home at night.

Every Friday I got paid, and when I would walk home from work, my neighbor who sat on her porch and smoked cigarettes knew I got paid and would approach me and say, “I know you got paid today, can I have $5?”

Because I had this people-pleasing mentality, I would give her the money before I went in the house.

This went on for about 4 weeks, and then one day it dawned on me that I was the one working hard for that money while she sat on her porch.

I was using my hard-earned money to help her buy more cigarettes, and I was tired of it. I told myself the next time I got paid, and she asked for $5, I would tell her no.

Friday came around, and she approached me while I was walking home and said, “Can I have $5?” Instead of standing my ground and saying no, I gave it to her. That day, I didn’t feel like I just gave her my money, but I also gave her my power, and that infuriated me.

The following week I got paid; she walked up and said, “Can I have $5?” and I said “NO,” which left a devastating look on her face. She then said, “It’s just $5.”

I responded, “It’s just $5 to you because you’re not the one in the scorching heat working for it. You are sitting on your porch every day smoking cigarettes. If you want $5, go work for it!”

She got angry and started calling me selfish. I walked away with a smile on my face because I had stood my ground for my $5 and my power.

Why Saying NO Is Your Greatest Power

People-pleasing is a trap that we fall into because it feels easier to avoid conflict or rejection. But here’s the issue: every time you say “yes” when you want to say “no,” you chip away at your self-worth.

Your “no” is actually your power—your way of setting boundaries and prioritizing your well-being.

Think about it this way: when you say “no” to others, you’re saying “yes” to yourself. You’re protecting your time, energy, and resources so that you can invest them into what truly matters—your goals, dreams, and personal growth.

Sticking to your “no” is not just about refusing requests; it’s about teaching others to respect your limits. People may not always like it at first, but respect grows when you are consistent.

How to Stop Giving Your Power Away and Take Control

Now that you understand why it’s essential to say “no” and reclaim your power, let’s dive into actionable tips you can start using today:

1. Recognize Your People-Pleasing Patterns

The first step is awareness. Reflect on moments when you say “yes” even though you really want to say “no.” Ask yourself:

• Why do I feel compelled to say yes?
• Am I afraid of disappointing others?
• Do I feel guilty for putting my needs first?

Recognizing these patterns helps you understand the emotional triggers behind your decisions and prepares you to make conscious choices.

2. Practice Saying NO and Stick to It

When someone asks something of you that doesn’t align with your priorities, practice saying “no” firmly but kindly. You don’t owe anyone an elaborate explanation.

 “Your no is your power.”

Sticking to your “no” can be challenging at first, especially if you’re used to people-pleasing.

You might face guilt trips or pushback, just like I did with my neighbor who tried to guilt-trip me into giving her money. Stand your ground. Your peace and progress depend on it.

3. Set Clear Boundaries

Boundaries are the invisible lines that protect your time, energy, and emotions. Setting boundaries means being clear about what you will and won’t accept from others. For example, you might decide:

• Not to lend money to people who don’t respect your limits.
• To limit your availability for favors or social obligations.
• To prioritize your personal goals over others’ demands.

Communicating these boundaries assertively helps others understand your limits.

4. Focus on Building Self-Worth and Self-Discipline

Self-worth and self-discipline go hand in hand with reclaiming your power. When you believe you are worthy of success and happiness, you are more likely to make choices that support your growth.

Self-discipline helps you stay consistent with your boundaries and goals, even when it’s uncomfortable.

5. Prioritize Your Goals and Dreams

When you stop giving your power away, you free up mental and emotional space to focus on what truly matters. Make a list of your top goals and dreams, and commit to investing your time and energy into them.

Remember, your dreams are valid, and you deserve to pursue them without guilt or distraction. Saying “no” to others’ demands is a vital step toward saying “yes” to your future.

Take Control and Own Your Power Today

Taking ownership of the power within you to say no to others will help you stay in control of your life when people try to take your power away.

Let no one make you feel you need their permission to put yourself first. Instead, take control and own your power because You Are WORTHY TO BE GREAT!