On one of the hottest days and a tough fasting day during Ramadan, a young man from an orphanage was chewing my brains for help.
He had come for the third time, and I had already helped him generously twice before. I tried to politely refuse, but he was adamant, and this made me transition into my anger avatar, which made him take a U-turn and run for his life.
I felt guilty for days, despite learning that his demands were as fake as his appeals, all full of lies and deceit.
And then soon after, I met someone similar, but out of guilt, I ended up giving away more than was required, and then it resulted in
This person started coming every week with similar false sob stories.
and I ---- back in my anger avatar, only to suffer from guilt diarrhoea for days to come!
Do you see a pattern here?
My polite self---refuses---people adamant --- I get into rage, lash out --- Rage now mellows and becomes Guilt --- guilt then leads to doing what my values are not aligned to ---then a similar event occurs or I meet someone who seeks help----My polite self refuses.-- people adamant --I get into rage.
This interplay of Rage and Guilt in a repetitive behaviour kept me stuck in a pattern, impacting my mental health.
The way out was not simple, but also not impossible.
Do you also have patterns unknown to you that keep you stuck in life, where you meet yourself in similar situations, with very similar outcomes?
Yes,
I've designed something for you which might help you break that pattern.
Click here to access it.
Warmly,
Mehnaz Amjad.
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