BECOME MORE DECISIVE - USING FRICTION

Decision making becomes more difficult when our options are increased, this is the concept of analysis paralysis.

There are layers upon layers that effect our decision making.

The principle of less is more can be very helpful in this area too.

The foundation is that we have limited mental capacity, so we want to use that energy efficiently.

To waste energy pondering decisions is not the way.

To prevent this we must prioritize enhancing our ability to swiftly and intelligently make choices.

Simplifying choices

Begin to recognize how many decisions you're making each day, it's about constant.

To speak or to listen, to eat this or that, to do this now or later, to reach out or not ETC.

We need to become great decision makers.

The more decisions you can make automatic the smoother your days will be.

So we're speaking about creating systems.

If you can staple down a bunch of necessary actions into a structure, you don't have to think as much... Consider what times of day you do certain activities.

I wake up super early, because doing certain task is way easier in the morning for me.

These acts are also top priorities.

You can literally set your day up in a manner that allows you to do what's most important first.

This involves being detailed and intentional, will write more on that down the road.

The hustle culture is quite foolish, they make it seem like you can't work hard and enjoy life.

That's just not accurate.

If you know what needs to be done, when it needs to be done and have a system for accomplishing it you will generate free time by how efficient you work.

Then in your free time you can actually invest that time, learning to enjoy healthy activities like walking, reading and meditating.

Of course you can even mix some comforting TV in there, we don't have to be perfect if we're doing great in most of our life.

Continuous reflection and an aim to grow is the crucial aspect.

Make it easy

The word system can seem big and intimidating.

It took me a bit to begin to understand what this actually is.

In my terms, a system is the process of automating a set of task.

Now it could be a full automation or you could be organizing in a manner that makes the execution of these actions occur in a domino like fashion.

The less thinking you have to do the better...

We do so much damn thinking.

You know, the biggest regret people have on their death beds is that they never stopped to smell the roses.

What's this mean?

THEY THOUGHT TOO MUCH.

You probably do too, I know I did until I decided to focus on experiencing more and thinking less.

I'm not saying don't think ever again.

I'm saying we think too much and toning that down a bit will reduce your stress levels.

Workaholism is the addiction to thinking, it's a trap that people fall into, not understanding that working more actually does not bring them the peace they're searching for.

It does reduce the suffering a bit, because they're using the mind, not totally stuck sitting with the mind. What's the solution? Systematizing your daily work process.

Learning through trial and error what's the correct amount of work to commit to each day.

We must get work done.

We must take care of our health.

This means we need to reflect and be aware of balance in general, to listen to the signals our body and mind gives us.

So take some time and write down all the daily things you do...

Get everything on paper.

See what times you should be doing certain task, which acts you can knock out in a single 45M session and each week take a look at where you could make the system a bit smoother.

Do this overtime and you'll create something great.

Know what to avoid

There are many traps when it comes to making the correct choices.

What other people want is one of the biggest ones.

See, you're going to want to understand that everybody is a bit selfish.

People often will give expecting something in return, they'll do everything they can to get something out of you.

What's this mean?

You must get crystal clear on what you want in life and what your main priorities are.

If not I promise you'll end up being a worker bee building somebody else's dream life.

I prefer you prioritize your own dream life.

So it's critical that you become good at saying no.

It doesn't have to be said in a rude manner, but you must learn how to stand up for your time and how to guard your energy.

If you don't get great at saying no you'll never have the time to do what you must for yourself.

Decide what type of life you desire.

It's fine to do whatever you want, but many people end up lying to themselves...

Selling themselves short due to psychological wiring and then regretting that they had not bet on their own dreams.

Nobody knows what you should be doing more than you, trusting your gut overtime is going to be a great decision.

Believe in your ability.

It's going to increase the likely hood of success so much if you have faith in your ability.

If you're working with natural interest and commit to becoming your most you will learn and grow through the project.

This comes full circle.

Society will pressure you.

It's your duty to stay strong and to create your own path.

When making decisions you want to consider both the short term and long term consequences, balance the decision on an understanding of both outcomes.

Usually it's a horrible decision to chase after quick cash.

Usually the bad decisions lack big picture thinking and involve chasing quick pleasure.

Negative and uncomfortable feelings are not bad, they're a sign it's time to change.

Notice, then improve

Continuous reflection is a must if you desire an enjoyable and peaceful life.

You are meant to be paying attention to how you feel and to be curious about why that's the case.

Your life can be better.

If we pay attention to the details of our lives we can create an amazing day to day experience by strategically planning and executing.

It takes time, education and awareness.

When you reflect you notice what can be improved.

Then once you know something can be better, you question to get down to the root cause of what's holding that thing back.

I'd rather teach you how to fish then simply toss you fish.

So let's take the quality of my sleep for example.

If I get less then 8 hours I notice the following day.

If I eat before bed, I notice the following day.

Many people won't even notice how a decision they made is effecting them.

That's not good.

See, we can't improve that which we don't know can be improved...

You must question more and focus on paying attention to why you feel how you feel, there's almost always a reason.

I'll list some traps that I was unaware of for a longtime:

-watching porn

-eating processed foods

-screens before bed

-picking up phone

-getting distracted between task

-letting the mind chatter consume me

If you do ANY of this, start paying more attention to how it may be effecting you, it is effecting you.

Friction

To help your decision making process I want to speak about this concept of adding and removing friction.

I just mentioned how watching porn is a trap, I'm not going to go into why because I've talked about that a lot and if any of you want a deeper explanation reply to this and I'll either write a thread or make a YouTube video on it.

What I want to do here is show you how to make the right choices.

Let's say you've committed to quitting porn, of course you still have urges as this was a habit.

This is where adding friction comes in.

Humans desire the path of least resistance naturally.

Watching porn is psychologically addicting because it has a great dopamine reward for such little effort.

So knowing it's an effortless activity, it can be difficult to get away from.

You will have a much easier time staying disciplined if you add friction, this is artificially creating some barrier between you and the act.

I've made it so I can't use web browsers on my phone, I don't need them and it's the perfect way to avoid porn.

So you also can use this idea in reverse, to remove friction for a healthy habit you're aiming to build. Lets say you want to start mediating.

For me the best time is in the morning.

To remove friction I create time in my schedule for the task which is a priority.

I make sure I get high quality sleep so my mind feels good.

I do the activity at a certain time of day which suits how I feel at that time on average.

I make sure to do it before others wake so I have pure peace and quiet.

There are so many ways to get creative with adding and removing friction, this concept can help you in about any area. If you’ve loved the letter, you’ll love my project I just finished. It’s the foundation to you upgrading your life. Consider Checking it out!

Maybe try these, let me know how it goes!

Get clear on where you're headed if you don't make any changes, take a big picture outlook on what your life is becoming.

I don't want you to become one of those people who's too far gone.

It's totally okay for you to be who you're, but if you want to improve it's not okay for you to stay as is.

Now don't sugar coat it, are you happy with the idea of who you're becoming?

If not, what can you begin changing right now to start feeling better?

Look at:

-consumption

-habits

-environment

-mindset

-addictions

-bigger picture alignment

There's always something we can improve, don't lie to yourself.

Please also take a deep breath and understand you're in the correct place at the correct time, do not be overwhelmed.

If feeling worried and anxious do us both a favor and go walk for at least 10 minutes.

Life is about learning daily and becoming more aligned with who you are deep inside, nobody can ever do this work for you.

I APPRECIATE YOU

Becoming a better decision maker is going to be a skill that pays dividends every single day.

It's great when you're confident in your abilities.

This way you don't need to depend on others to make choices for you, of course collaboration is a great option but it's not a need!

It's much better to have options, rather than be chained to a certain thing.

I'd love to hear your takeaway from reading this! Do you have anything you'd like me to write and speak about?  

HEY! - If you enjoyed, maybe share this with a friend, that would mean so much to me.

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