There’s a moment most of us know too well.

You’re about to step into a meeting, send the pitch, answer the email, or even have a conversation that matters, and something in you tightens. Not full panic, not collapse, just that familiar whisper:

Who do you think you’re fooling. 👀

Everyone hears some version of that line. It’s practically the theme song of imposter syndrome. And for years we’ve all been handed the same quick fix.

Fake it til you make it.

🎭 Act like you’re confident. Pretend you’ve got it handled. Put on the polished version of yourself and don’t let anyone see the cracks.

Maybe you’ve done this. Maybe it even helped once or twice. Enough to get you through a moment that felt bigger than you.

But here’s the part no one warned us about.

Faking it doesn’t build confidence. It builds distance.

Distance between who you are and who you think you’re supposed to be.

While you’re busy performing the version of yourself that looks acceptable on the outside, the real you ends up standing in the wings, waiting for permission to come back out. And that kind of split is exhausting. It drains your creativity. It steals your joy. It’s like wearing clothes that never quite fit, but everyone swears you look great in them.

The more I’ve stepped into my own authenticity, the more I can feel that old advice falling apart in my hands. Because fake it til you make it was never really about growth. It was about survival. It taught us how to blend in, not how to belong. It taught us how to pass the test, not how to trust ourselves.

Imposter syndrome doesn’t show up because you’re unqualified.

It shows up when you disconnect from yourself.

Which means pretending your way through it just locks you deeper into the thing you’re trying to escape.

The real shift happens when you stop rehearsing a polished version of yourself and start showing up as the person you already are. Not the perfected future self. Not the curated version you hope people will approve of. Just you. The thinking, learning, trying, growing human who is actually doing the work.

That’s where confidence comes from. Not performance. Presence.

And once you feel that, it changes everything.

You stop chasing someone else’s idea of what “making it” looks like.

You stop worrying about whether you’re doing it right.

You stop bracing for the moment someone finds out you’re human.

You finally start building trust in yourself, not the mask.

Maybe that’s the real secret.

Not faking anything.

Not waiting for some magical moment where you become flawless.

Just letting yourself be the person who shows up and keeps going, even while learning on the fly.

If you have that, you’re already making it.

If this is landing for you, grab your mug and wander with me into Decoding the Shift below. I’m pulling apart the whole fake it versus manifesting mix up, and it’s a good one. ☕️

🎄Oh, and before you wander off, make sure you pick up your free holiday wallpapers. They’re available until December 26th and they add the perfect touch of slightly unhinged seasonal cheer. Click here to download them.

Shine without shrinking ✨

Decoding the Shift: Fake It Til You Make It vs Manifesting

It is no wonder people confuse fake it til you make it with manifesting. A lot of manifesting advice includes the classic “act as if” concept. Act as if you already have the thing you want. Act as if the version of you who has it is already here. Act as if the future is sitting right in your lap purring like a satisfied cat. 🐱

And when you hear that, of course it sounds like fake it til you make it with better lighting.

But here’s the real distinction.

Fake it til you make it is external. It is a performance.

It asks you to convince other people. It asks you to hide your doubt, tighten your jaw, adjust your posture, and pretend you are the polished final draft of yourself.

Manifesting is internal. It is energetic, emotional, and grounded.

It asks you to convince no one but your own nervous system. It asks you to practice the feeling of possibility instead of constantly bracing for disappointment.

Fake it says perform so the world believes it.

✨ Manifesting says align so you believe it.

Fake it says hide the messy human parts.

Manifesting says acknowledge them and still choose to move toward what you want.

Fake it asks you to wear a mask.🎭

Manifesting asks you to shift your mindset.

The “act as if” part of manifesting never meant pretend you have something you don’t. It meant embody the qualities, boundaries, energy, or calm confidence that naturally supports the thing you’re calling in.

Not “act like a millionaire while ignoring your bank account.”

More like “act like someone who trusts themselves with money.”

Not “pretend your dream job has already happened.”

More like “show up as someone who is worthy of meaningful work.”

That is a very different flavor of action.

So when fake it til you make it feels heavy and scripted, while manifesting feels like you just opened a window inside your chest, that’s why.

One drags you away from yourself.

The other helps you come home. 🏡

If someone popped into your mind while you were reading, invite them in. This community grows best through warm handoffs. And if they sign up at https://sendfox.com/tmariehilton before December 26th, they’ll get the holiday wallpapers too.